Eps 224: SOLO - Creating mindfulness in our romantic partnerships

COMMUNITY IS EVERYTHING!

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Today is a solo show – woop woop!

Being in a mindful relationship…

• What is mindfulness?
• Why is it important on the parenting journey?
• Why is this important in life?

I went to a mindful couples workshop with my husband this weekend

• Why did we go?

Morning of…

• How I did my work when it was hard to do

Modeling setting intention

Letting go of being attached to the experience of my husband

• Why this is relevant to our kids and parenting and life

Setting the context with how I showed up and what I was willing to own

Offering lots of loving support, acknowledgement, options

• While also leaning in and inviting vulnerability – speaking into the elephants in the room, making things explicit

Learning processes for deeper listening and communication

• SO MUCH like PD
  • Connect before correct/redirect
  • Positive Intent
  • Looking for solutions not blame
  • The iceberg
  • Process over product –
    • Relationship is everything!!!
    • Took the trainer aside to share….

One of the processes reminded me so much of the Family Meeting, but instead of using the model for the family, you use it as a couple.

• Safe space for venting about a few things that rubbed you wrong
• A useful place for problem solving
  • I would add time to celebrate each other before getting into it….
• One of our “issues” is talking about money – ben makes most of it, I budget and try to save it. This is a hard one for us to discuss without having clear goals that are the boss.
• Come together to have a vision
• What is this going to take
• Weekly check ins on how we are doing

I also have some amazing clients that are such an inspiration to me.

• Super intentional with checking in on relationship
• Super articulate in how they are celebrating each other

20 years later…. It takes work

• Awareness that we are in an ebb
• Willingness to do something about it

Kristen Bell – “I will be with Dax on the porch at 80” – we can get through anything

So yeah, tend to your relationships – we talk so much about our relationship with our teens and younger kids here – equally if not more important is our relationship with our partners.

Hope you are feeling inspired!!

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