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Joyful Courage - A Conscious Parenting Podcast

Joyful Courage is a Conscious Parenting Podcast. Be inspired, entertained and educated as we navigate the challenges and celebrations of choosing to be a conscious parent. Interviews and solo shows will provide listeners with tools, strategies and inspiration that can be directly applied to their parenting journey.
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Now displaying: 2019
Dec 31, 2019

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey AUDIOBOOK is available!! I am confident that the Joyful Courage audiobook will be a supportive companion as you ride it out with your kids – full of stories and tools that will connect you with self and others, the audiobook will be something you can listen to over and over and over again. Follow Joyful Courage on FB and IG, and sign up for my weekly newsletter at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

::::

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook groups:
Live and Love with Joyful Courage
Joyful Courage for Parents of Teens

::::

 

Today is a solo show, reflecting on 2019 – the celebrations, the lessons, all of it. I am so grateful for the community and the love you send me and each other on the daily!!

Adolescent Mental Health Mini summit registration: www.joyfulcourage.com/mhminisummit

See you in the new year!

 

:::::

GET THE BOOK!

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Dec 17, 2019

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey AUDIOBOOK is available!! I am confident that the Joyful Courage audiobook will be a supportive companion as you ride it out with your kids – full of stories and tools that will connect you with self and others, the audiobook will be something you can listen to over and over and over again. Follow Joyful Courage on FB and IG, and sign up for my weekly newsletter at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

::::

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook groups:
Live and Love with Joyful Courage
Joyful Courage for Parents of Teens

::::

Today’s guest is Aparna Venkataraman. Aparna is a parent coach, meditation teacher, motivational speaker and global wellness advocate for doTERRA essential oils. Her approachable nature, strong intuition and problem solving skills guide her in supporting parents of babies, toddlers and teens to empower themselves and build healthy relationships with one another through effective communication, confidence building and light hearted mindfulness techniques.

She values authenticity, which you all know is one of my favorites, a kind nature, motivation, love, compassion, gratitude and humor as key components of a beautiful life. She’s here to share ways that families can relieve stress through self care, mindfulness and effective communication. Join us!

"Self care means to me to find ways to connect back to what is lighting me up, what is helping me to find peace and stay connected to my authentic self.”

“There are simple things you can do each day that can help you to create a routine where you're feeling connected to yourself and not just waiting until the weekend until you have much more time”

“We can put a lot of pressure on ourselves to be a certain way and to show up in the world as somebody who has it all together. When we're really actually stressed, really, really stressed on the inside.”

What you’ll hear in this episode:

  • Self-care beyond manicures and exercise 
  • Why self care doesn’t have to wait for the weekend 
  • The pressure to keep up appearances
  • How to tell when you’re connecting to your authentic self
  • What is intrinsic self care
  • The power behind finding our why 
  • How spirituality can be helpful 
  • The role of breath in self care
  • Stress, parenting and mindfulness 
  • Tips for learning mindfulness 
  • Ways to start small in your mindfulness 
  • Laughter as stress relief

 

What does Joyful Courage mean to you?

So joyful courage in the context of an intrinsic self care practice, that's the courage to show up. vulnerably, really, and to do what I really want to do, and even if it doesn't make sense to anyone, or even to myself, but to do what feels good and what I want to do, and to not be afraid of sharing that if I feel like sharing that with somebody, but to not be afraid to find the joy in things as we just talked about when things don't feel great, not being afraid to do that and knowing that when I'm doing that I'm taking care of myself and I'm helping myself to really make the day feel a little easier so I can move through my day too. That, I think, is joyful courage when I'm taking care of myself and doing something that feels great especially on those days that don't feel great.

 

Resources: 

Essential Oils

 

Where to find  Aparna:

Website InstagramFacebook

:::::

GET THE BOOK!

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

 

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

 

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

 

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Dec 10, 2019

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey AUDIOBOOK is available!! I am confident that the Joyful Courage audiobook will be a supportive companion as you ride it out with your kids – full of stories and tools that will connect you with self and others, the audiobook will be something you can listen to over and over and over again. Follow Joyful Courage on FB and IG, and sign up for my weekly newsletter at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

::::

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook groups:
Live and Love with Joyful Courage
Joyful Courage for Parents of Teens

::::

SOLO SHOW!

I have shared about going to therapy – and quite a few of you have reached out and shared that this has prompted YOU to find this kind of support in your community – SO HAPPY!

I told you how I shopped around and chose on that I thought was the right fit. I had actually had some one I trust and worked with suggest that somatic therapy was really the fit I wanted, so that is what I looked for.

Even after shopping around, after a few sessions, I felt unsatisfied with the experience. IT felt slow and directionless. Now, this could ABSOLUTELY say something about me, right? Have I spoken before about my need to get things moving and FIX problems???

I have another friend that told me that I would LOVE who she was seeing – it’s a man, interestingly enough I thought I wanted to work with women but I LOVE THIS GUY. And while he isn’t solving my problems and going into “fix it” mode – the masculine energy is what I am noticing is supporting the work. But it also feels balanced because there does seem to be spaciousness, but my experience of the time spent with him feel directional.

So, all that to say that you all have permission to change up your mental health team if something feels off. Unapologetically.

Today I want to talk about something that has been coming up for me, AND with some of my clients. I have a feeling you are all going to relate with this as well.

So let me set this up and you can decide if you can relate….

You are looking ahead to the weekend. Everyone is going to be home on Sunday and you would really like to have a family day, time together doing something…. Maybe you’ll all decide to go to a movie or do a project, but you know that time together is something you all need and Sunday is the perfect time….

Sunday rolls around and your partner gets busy with a home improvement project that looks like it is going to last all day, one of you kids has made plans with friends and gets irritated when you tell him nope, you have to be home. And maybe the other child is looking for “alone time” rather than “together time.”

Literally no one is on board with a family day.

Maybe you use language like:

“I was kinda hoping we could do something with the kids today” or “It’s important to me that we spend time together as a family” or “I really wish you wanted to hang out with us”

And then our people carry one with the home improvement, making plans with friends, or retreating into their bedroom.

And what happens to us? Well, what happens to me is I start to feel really angry and resentful. I feel slighted, disrespected, dismissed. I then continue to interact with my family from this place. The energy of the house shifts and everyone is now MOTIVATED to be busy with their own thing, away from mom, who has now moved into bitch/blamer mode.

From the outside looking in, this is ridiculous, right?

Did I even explicitly SAY to my family, “lets spend Sunday afternoon together?” and make it a plan? No.

Were my family rejecting me when they carried on with what they needed/planned for that day? No.

Did I actually FUEL disconnection in my response to them? Yes.

Right, get it together, Casey.

But in the moment…..  In the moment it feels like rejection. IT feels like no one cares. Thoughts of failure show up, catastrophizing…. Comparison to other families that are FOR SURE joyfully doing something wonderful with THEIR families. What is wrong with us?

And all of this comes also with tightness in my chest and belly, a clenched jaw, furrowed brow – an overall experience of tension. And that is the physical sensation that typically leads me into a mindset of poor me, gosh darn it, I am hurting and they need to know it.

Its funny too, when I am feeling this way, I get really uptight if the kids are on their screens, or their rooms are a mess – all of a sudden I can see a million things that bother me and I am throwing it at them.

And it isn’t about the screens or the rooms, it’s about the hurt I am experience, that I actually set myself up for!!

And this can really sneak up on you too, right? When you expect one response and get something else? This is something I am working out with my therapist, because when my expectations are challenged, I go into fight or flight – typically fight mode. My thinking gets rigid, and I am grasping for control….  Yeah, it’s a control thing I think. And I am sure this can be traced back to my interpretation of stability or instability growing up.

So what do we do???  IF you have read my book, you know that I highlight that experience of awareness “I know I am pissed and should calm down” coupled with the justification of  “but god damn it they need to KNOW”

Yeah……. Raise your hand if you know the struggle. It’s like the emotional experience has tentacles and it’s holding us captive. Because if we move through it, move through or anger and resentment in a positive way, and then show up from a place of connection and love, what?

There is this idea that if others don’t feel our pain, they are somehow getting away with something. The reality is, when what we are being triggered by is an internal experience that we are having, and then responding to others from that place of pain, all they really are is confused, or perhaps scared.

So, how about we choose to do something different when this resentment shows up? Lets start with getting some space.

Meme:

I am unworthy.

I am noticing, that I am having the thought, that I am unworthy.

I am being rejected/dismissed/ignored

I am noticing, that I am having the thought, that I am being rejected/dismissed/ignored

Is it true?

Yes or no – what can I do about it?

If the answer is yes, have a meaning full conversation with the people that you feel are involved (I love the conversation I had on Eps 174: Learning to be a more mindful communicator with Oren Jay Sofer, check it out)

If the answer is no, take care of yourself. Feel your feelings and give yourself a chance to process them. Journal. Talk to a friend. Talk to your therapist. Be with your experience and move through it, rather than avoid it or distract yourself from feeling it.

Ok, so what can we do to be proactive? 

If you want something, be explicit about it, not vague. You can’t expect for your children to tease apart your generalizations to hear what you are really trying to say.

This sounds like:

“Sunday afternoon we are all going to be home and I would like us to do something together from 1-5, so don’t make any plans, please.”

As the holidays get closer, know that you are going to be making lots of plans and expectations in your head. Take this opportunity to speak into the experience you would like to have. Encourage and invite your family into the planning so that they know what to expect and what YOU expect. Find flexibility too – because you are SHARING the experience with others…

Helpful?

I love this topic – know that I am actively practicing what I shared with you today, all the time. Imperfectly.

We are all in this together, friends!!

:::::

GET THE BOOK!

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Dec 3, 2019

Follow Joyful Courage on FB and IG, and sign up for my weekly newsletter at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

::::

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook groups:
Live and Love with Joyful Courage
Joyful Courage for Parents of Teens

::::

Today’s guest is Tonya Dalton. Tonya is a productivity expert, writer, speaker and founder of Inkwell Press Productivity Company, a company centered around productivity tools and training. she released her book The Joy of Missing Out on October 1, she's going to share a little bit about her book with us. Tanya is also the mother of two teenagers and really knows what it means to be the leader of a family.  Join us!

 

" I love that it feels like a permission slip. Like I feel like I have permission to just stop chasing my tail.”

“We're filling our calendars, but we're not really filling our souls.”

“it's really about mindful living. It's really about living with intention.”

“Productivity is not about doing more. It's about doing what is most important.”

“Life is meant to be enjoyed, not just endured.”

“None of us truly have it all together all of the time.”

“Balance is a myth.”

 

What you’ll hear in this episode:

  • The glorification of busy
  • The obligation and pressure to be busy 
  • How not being busy makes us feel about ourselves 
  • How being busy keeps us from nurturing ourselves and others 
  • Quality over quantity 
  • Embracing imperfection
  • Releasing the need to be busy 
  • “Shoulding” on ourselves and why that’s not helpful 
  • Living mindfully with intention
  • Prioritizing activities instead of trying to do all the things
  • Letting go of “Some Day” Syndrome
  • The stories we tell ourselves and unreasonably high expectations
  • Getting curious about our responses to life 
  • Examining our comfort zones and if they are serving us
  • How releasing perfectionism supports connection
  • Letting people lift you up as a gift to them
  • Family as a team
  • Sunday planning as a ritual
  • Division of labor based on team member needs and supporting each other
  • Belonging and significance and filling each other’s buckets
  • Encouraging ownership and buy in with your kids
  • Letting go of balance
  • Finding flexibility in the mess

 

What does Joyful Courage mean to you?

 

I love this question because I think joyful courage to me really means the ability to stand up, to feel confident in your choices, and to live the life you really want. Because here's the truth, you know, living a life is centered on your priorities and letting your priorities sit front and center every day is a choice. And it's not always an easy choice because people will question it. People will pull you in different directions wanting you to say yes to things when really you should be saying no. And so really joyful courage is standing tall and standing true to what is most important to you.

 

Resources: 

The Joy of Missing Out

Productivity Paradox podcast 

Weekly kickstart notepad

 

Where to find Tonya:

TonyaDalton.com

Inkwell Press

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SUPER SHOPPING SEASON PACKAGES!!

Joyful Courage School Age Bundle - $59

Super excited to bring some of my favorite programs out of the archives to support you in the deeply personal work of being the parenting you want to be. Each of these programs were designed to help you gain more insight on how you are showing up as a parent, with tips and tools for growth. While all three of these programs are easily modified for parents with kids of all ages, you will find that they are most useful for school aged kids.

Teen Audio Summit - $39

The Teen Audio Summit is a collection of 15 interviews with Positive Discipline Trainers and Lead Trainers who have been in the trenches with raising teenagers. When you purchase the summit, you will get every interview in full to return to again and again. Every time I listen to these interviews I learn something new, or understand something deeper.

 

“I have learned SO MUCH listening to these! Thank you all for the work and wisdom that went in to putting this together!”

- Teen Audio Summit parent

 

Joyful Courage Super Bundle - $79

 

For those of you with kids that cross the span of school age to teens. Get all the programs of the School Age Bundle AND the Teen Audio Summit. YES!

 

 

:::::

 

GET THE BOOK!

 

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

 

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

 

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

Parenting is messy. Alongside all of the joy comes and emotional freight train full of challenges and frustration. Your child can instantly trigger strong reactions that leave you feeling angry and out of control. What if you didn’t respond so emotionally every time? What if you could learn to be more present to the experience you were having? Might you feel like a better parent?

Joyful Courage: Calming the Drama and Taking Control of Your Parenting Journey helps parents navigate the roller coaster of parenting to reveal:

  • How identifying your body’s physical reaction to stress is the first step to taking control of your parenting

  • Why our past experiences add to the conflict with out kids and what to do about it.

  • Real-life stories from parents riding the emotional freight train.

  • The Three B’s Method to change your reaction anytime, anywhere.

  • How to grow your relationship with all of the people that you love.

From toddlers to teenagers, Joyful Courage is the practical and thoughtful resource for parents to navigate the challenge of raising children while choosing to be connected and engaged. Parents can learn how to be the best for their families with Joyful Courage.

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Nov 26, 2019

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey AUDIOBOOK is available now!! I am confident that the Joyful Courage audiobook will be a supportive companion as you ride it out with your kids – full of stories and tools that will connect you with self and others, the audiobook will be something you can listen to over and over and over again. Follow Joyful Courage on FB and IG, and sign up for my weekly newsletter at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

::::

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook groups:
Live and Love with Joyful Courage
Joyful Courage for Parents of Teens

::::

Today is a solo show.

I missed you all last week…. As you know, I am in the throes of navigating my own parenting journey and sometimes that means stepping away from my professional work to focus on my family.

For all of you out there who are feeling like you are the only one struggling on this path, it simply IS NOT TRUE. We all have our own way of sharing with the world, and many people just don’t. They keep the hard stuff to themselves, leaving the rest of us thinking that their lives are easy-breezy.

This podcast, and this episode, is my way of pulling back the curtain and sharing from am deeply authentic place. The Joyful Courage community is a place for all of us to bring our whole, vulnerable selves.

There is plenty to worry about on the parenting path, especially as our kids transform into teens and beyond. When is the fear useful, and when is it getting in the way of hearing our own wise, intuition? I explore that today.

I hope you enjoy it!

::::

Parenting Teens with Positive Discipline Audio Summit FOREVER PACKAGE

15 interviews that highlight all the things that show up during the teen years. !5 experts in Positive Discipline who KNOW the world of parenting teens joined me in powerful, useful conversations that I know you will love.

Click here to buy the Forever Package.

:::::

GET THE BOOK!

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Nov 12, 2019

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey AUDIOBOOK is here!! I am confident that the Joyful Courage audiobook will be a supportive companion as you ride it out with your kids – full of stories and tools that will connect you with self and others, the audiobook will be something you can listen to over and over and over again.  Get it now at www.joyfulcourage.com/book.

::::

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook groups:
Live and Love with Joyful Courage
Joyful Courage for Parents of Teens

::::

My guest today is Hunter Clarke-Fields. 

Hunter is a yoga and mindfulness coach, the host of the Mindful Mama Podcast, and supporter of moms near and far. She is also a mama herself and walks her talk with her two daughters. I had the great pleasure of being a guest on Hunter’s podcast and am thrilled to host here on the Joyful Courage Podcast.

Hunter’s book, Raising Good Humans: A Mindful Guide to Breaking the Cycle of Reactive Parenting and Raising Kind, Confident Kids is available now, and I am super honored to share her wisdom with you all today.

Where to find Hunter: 

Raising Good Humans Book Page: Raising Good Humans Book.com

Facebook Page: Hunter Clarke-Fields, Mindful Mama Mentor

Instagram: Mindful Mama Mentor

Twitter: HClarkeFields

LinkedIn: Hunter Clarke-Fields

::::

Parenting Teens with Positive Discipline Audio Summit FOREVER PACKAGE

15 interviews that highlight all the things that show up during the teen years. !5 experts in Positive Discipline who KNOW the world of parenting teens joined me in powerful, useful conversations that I know you will love.

Click here to buy the Forever Package.

:::::

GET THE BOOK!

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Nov 5, 2019

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey AUDIOBOOK will be available so soon!! I am confident that the Joyful Courage audiobook will be a supportive companion as you ride it out with your kids – full of stories and tools that will connect you with self and others, the audiobook will be something you can listen to over and over and over again.  Keep staying tuned in for details as we get closer to launch day!! Follow Joyful Courage on FB and IG, and sign up for my weekly newsletter at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

::::

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook groups:
Live and Love with Joyful Courage
Joyful Courage for Parents of Teens

::::

 

This week is a solo show and I am totally going free style. There aren’t much for show notes, I hope you listen and that what is shared resonates with you. We are all in this together!

 

::::

 

Parenting Teens with Positive Discipline Audio Summit FOREVER PACKAGE

 

15 interviews that highlight all the things that show up during the teen years. !5 experts in Positive Discipline who KNOW the world of parenting teens joined me in powerful, useful conversations that I know you will love.

 

Click here to buy the Forever Package.

 

:::::

 

GET THE BOOK!

 

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

 

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

 

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

 

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

 

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

 

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Oct 29, 2019

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey AUDIOBOOK will be available so soon!! I am confident that the Joyful Courage audiobook will be a supportive companion as you ride it out with your kids – full of stories and tools that will connect you with self and others, the audiobook will be something you can listen to over and over and over again.  Keep staying tuned in for details as we get closer to launch day!! Follow Joyful Courage on FB and IG, and sign up for my weekly newsletter at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

::::

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook groups:
Live and Love with Joyful Courage
Joyful Courage for Parents of Teens

::::

Today’s guest is Jaynay C. Johnson. Jaynay is a therapist, speaker and author, dedicating much of her time and energy to serving adolescent girls and their families. From suffering from teen depression to being written off from family and teachers as being just another troubled teen, Jaynay has always been a firm believer that at any given moment you have the power to say "This is not how the story is going to end." Jennay chose to take control of her story, choosing to dedicate her life to uplifting and empowering the leaders of tomorrow. Jaynay's body of work includes published books, magazine features, radio interviews and multiple guest appearances. A lady of elegance, poise, motivation and hope for tomorrow's leaders Jennay embodies an uplifting message and presentation style that she believes the ones coming behind her will need in order to reach their greatest potential. Join us!

"I think the space where parents miss a great opportunity is to empathize.”

“The reality is phones are not bad. Internet is not bad. It's a tool.”

“If as the parent, you're constantly making the choices for them, you're almost telling them that you don't think that they can make good decision.”

“It is important for us all to just take a proactive approach and have conversations around the best practices of social media, the best practices of having a phone. And I think we just need to be doing that more frequently than we are.” 

What you’ll hear in this episode:

  • The evolution of the concept of adolescence
  • The audacity of “I know, because I was a teenager.”
  • Empathy and raising teens
  • Giving teens enough information to make informed decisions
  • The value of appropriate openness
  • Intergenerational differences
  • The role of mobile phones and when they tend to be introduced to Gen Z
  • Important conversations to have about phones with your kids
  • Big issues facing teens and their parents
  • Emotional intelligence and how it factors into the decision of which paths to pursue
  • Timing of college and the need to be open minded
  • Teaching your kids to trust themselves
  • Challenges facing teens and families of color
  • Being cognizant of cultural differences 

What does Joyful Courage mean to you?

So joyful courage means to me that, although it can be rough to have certain conversations and to pull out some of the, you know, darker sides of life, I find joy knowing that once we pull them out, they get a chance to see the light. And from there, everything goes up and up. So that's what it means to me, that I had the courage to pull it out. But then you're happy because it's out and once it's out, it can breathe.

Where to find Jaynay:

Instagram | Facebook | Twitter | Website

::::

Parenting Teens with Positive Discipline Audio Summit FOREVER PACKAGE

15 interviews that highlight all the things that show up during the teen years. !5 experts in Positive Discipline who KNOW the world of parenting teens joined me in powerful, useful conversations that I know you will love.

Click here to buy the Forever Package.

:::::

GET THE BOOK!

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join 

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Oct 23, 2019

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey AUDIOBOOK will be available so soon!! I am confident that the Joyful Courage audiobook will be a supportive companion as you ride it out with your kids – full of stories and tools that will connect you with self and others, the audiobook will be something you can listen to over and over and over again.  Keep staying tuned in for details as we get closer to launch day!! Follow Joyful Courage on FB and IG, and sign up for my weekly newsletter at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

::::

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook groups:
Live and Love with Joyful Courage
Joyful Courage for Parents of Teens

::::

Hey friends… thank you for meeting me here. Thank you for seeing me and for sharing the ways that this podcast resonates with you and supports you. I have received feedback from so many ofyou talking about how this show is a lifeline for you, and a place where the experience you are having on the parenting journey is validating.

When I first started this show….

  • I had been practicing and facilitating PD for about 7 years
  • Blogging about my experience was landing with readers
  • My community and access of parent educators was growing and I wanted to share conversations with all of you
  • I was looking for a creative way to share content and build my biz
  • I released my first four episodes on April 9th of 2015, my kids were 9 and 12 – in third and sixth grade…. Seems like a lifetime ago

What I didn’t see coming….

  • How easy it was to be in conversation with people I admired about the parenting jourey
  • That I would really be talking so much about HUMANING
  • My desire to do solo shows and share so vulnerably would be so strong
  • That my solo shows would land so deeply with the community
  • That I would feel such a deep connection to listeners
  • That the show would become a life line for ME
  • The tension of leading a community while also navigating the experience of my own children’s teen years…. 

I’m in a time of transition….

  • My offerings are geared more and more to parents of teens – this has been the result of looking for support myself and not finding offers that were useful to me, that spoke to me and my style of parenting…
  • I want to be having conversations about the teen years – but also about humaning, because inside of all of this work we are growing and developing as human beings – every single day I am living this….
  • What I am also noticing is that there are less interviews that I want to be having…. I am feeling less connected to the interview format and more drawn to just speaking directly to you….
  • So I hope that is ok……

 Life happens for you

  • This season is unexpected
  • Long time listeners know that I am in it deep and practicing every day to be as aware and awake as I can with my teens
  • We’ve dealt with it all and continue to e surprised by what is showing up – like, really surprised
  • We can’t know how the narrative will go – we can convince ourselves that we can control it only to be shown time and time again that we CAN NOT
  • I am again in a new place of being show that I have NO CONTROL of the narrative when it comes to my kids…. 

Radical Acceptance

  • Have you heard of this?
  • DBT (which I haven’t ever done and know really nothing about accepting something with all of your soul opening yourself to fully experience the reality of the moment
  • Fighting reality continues suffering
  • Being in acceptance allow “radically accept that you want something you don’t have and it’s not a catastrophe” – Marsha Lineham

Past and future fucks us up

  • How many of us feel guilty and rack our brains looking for where we screwed up? If we did it differently we wouldn’t be in the situation we are in….
  • But but but…. Shouldn’t we think about the future? And how can we not??? I have hopes and dreams for my kids, of course.
  • THEY ARE THE DESIGNERS OF THEIRL IFE AND HOW CAN I GET OUT OF THE WAY????????
  • Creating a space that is pure enough for them to trust themselves.

Popular conversations

  • Would have us believe that there is a five step process for getting the outcome we want with our kids
  • Popular conversations would have us believe that parenting is about them and not us
  • Popular conversations would have us believe that if things go sideways it is about something that we are doing wrong, that there is something to fix
  • Popular conversation blames the world today, technology, and teens themselves for what we are seeing 

What if popular conversation is wrong

What if parenting is all about us?

What if no matter WHAT we do, our kids are going to experience the path they are meant to experience?

What if right here, right now, is exactly as it is meant to be?

Radical acceptance.

If this is exactly where we are meant to be, with all fo the challenges that exist – and I see you out there. Those of you with kids who are navigating mental health challenges, drug use and abuse, risky behavior –

I see you out there who FROM THE BEGINNING were invited into radical acceptance due to your childs different abilities – whether they be physical, mental or emotional.  You are the ones that all of us can learn from. This is old news, this idea of accepting reality AS IT IS. Thank you for being models for the rest of us and modeling what this looks like….

If this is exactly where we are meant to be, if we accept rather than resist the reality that we are finding ourselves in day to day, then there must be a purpose.

Perhaps it is as simple as sitting in this space. Allowing the physical, emotional, and spiritual experience of this acceptance to live without trying to make it go away.

My own experience with this….

  • Eps 203 I talked about getting a therapist
  • Current situation creating a physical response in my body
  • Somatic therapy/radical acceptance called me to transform the experience
  • What also shows up….. self doubt (the ego is super loud)
  • Back to radical acceptance, back to turning inward and being with what is showing up

Raise your hand if you can’t sleep?

Raise your hand if your belly is tied up in knots?

Raise your hand if you are experiencing feat that is with you all.damn.day?

I see you.

Radical acceptance. Things are as they are.

  • Feel that
  • Notice what shows up
  • Allow it to have a voice
  • How does your body respond?
  • What happens when you bring compassion?
  • Can you be with it?

We are not in charge of the narrative that is our children’s lives. Yet , as that narrative plays out, we can write our own narrative about how we are going to show up……

And right now, the narrative that I am writing is one of radical acceptance.

I love you!

::::

Parenting Teens with Positive Discipline Audio Summit FOREVER PACKAGE

15 interviews that highlight all the things that show up during the teen years. !5 experts in Positive Discipline who KNOW the world of parenting teens joined me in powerful, useful conversations that I know you will love.

Click here to buy the Forever Package.

:::::

GET THE BOOK! 

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Oct 15, 2019

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey AUDIOBOOK will be available so soon!! I am confident that the Joyful Courage audiobook will be a supportive companion as you ride it out with your kids – full of stories and tools that will connect you with self and others, the audiobook will be something you can listen to over and over and over again.  Keep staying tuned in for details as we get closer to launch day!! Follow Joyful Courage on FB and IG, and sign up for my weekly newsletter at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

::::

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook groups:
Live and Love with Joyful Courage
Joyful Courage for Parents of Teens

::::

My guest today is Wendy Bertagnole.

Wendy Bertagnole, is a lover of chocolate, lifter of heavy weights, believer in wearing yoga clothes most every day, and a mother of three kids. She works with moms who are frustrated with their children’s behavior, helping them to once again enjoy motherhood and their children. With an undergrad degree in child development and a masters in special education, Wendy has taken what she’s learned, while also raising her three kids, to serve others 

Wendy knows that not every child shows up 100% happy and willing to cooperate every moment of every day, which can be frustrating. She believe every behavior is a form of communication and her mission is to help every parent understand what their child is communicating through their behavior.

Wendy’s work is aligned with the mission of Joyful Courage and I am thrilled to have some time to talk with her today.

Find Wendy:

Website | Podcast | Facebook | Instagram | Pinterest

:::: 

Parenting Teens with Positive Discipline Audio Summit FOREVER PACKAGE

15 interviews that highlight all the things that show up during the teen years. !5 experts in Positive Discipline who KNOW the world of parenting teens joined me in powerful, useful conversations that I know you will love.

Click here to buy the Forever Package.

:::::

GET THE BOOK!

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Oct 8, 2019

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey AUDIOBOOK will be available so soon!! I am confident that the Joyful Courage audiobook will be a supportive companion as you ride it out with your kids – full of stories and tools that will connect you with self and others, the audiobook will be something you can listen to over and over and over again.  Keep staying tuned in for details as we get closer to launch day!! Follow Joyful Courage on FB and IG, and sign up for my weekly newsletter at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

::::

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook groups:
Live and Love with Joyful Courage
Joyful Courage for Parents of Teens

::::

Today is a solo show – woohoo!

I am having a really hard time prepping a solo show…. Part of the problem is that I feel like I am really in my own work of finding some space inside of my fears and worries about my parenting.

Am I too permissive? Am I avoiding conflict? Or am I meeting my kids where they are at?

Am I being pragmatic, or is this confusing?

Am I enabling or am I meeting my children where they are at?

What is going to happen to them?

Will they be able to cope in the future?

Will they ever feel passionate about anything?

Do they feel worthy of showing up, standing up, giving back?

I literally have been waking up in the middle of the night gripped with tension in my body and mind, spinning through all of these questions, coupling this with “what if…”

Well – I made an appointment to see my fave energy worker to see if I could get some help with removing these blocks, letting go so I could release these fears. And you know what came up – it is time for me to get some therapy.

Yup.

See, I am super aware of what is happening when it is happening. I can see the way I am in the middle of my family, grasping for strings to bring me a sense of control and safety – what is really happening is that I am becoming so entangled in their experience, that I may actually be making things worse… Or maybe not, but the dynamics in my relationships are not what I want them to be.

Shift into love. Shift into connection.  Surrender, let go.

But what happened, what I learned  or was reminded of from my energy worker, is that the “shift” I want to have happen, that I actually want to have happen, is bypassing the very real need that my inner girl has to be seen and heard and felt.

Between the messages I received growing up, and the persona that I try to fill in my career, there is this mistaken idea that to belong, or to matter, or to be “doing my work” I need to not fall apart. That falling apart is somehow weak, or a crutch, or I don’t know….  Not enlightened?

I can pinpoint times in my life where my experience was being dismissed, where I was told that there wasn’t space for me to breakdown and I have internalized that to the point where I can’t move through my pain.

And right now, the pain is fear and self doubt and worry…. My system wants to take the short cut to just breathing, finding neutral with my body and taking the balcony seat (doesn’t that sound familiar?)

And I am not here to say that the breath body balcony tool isn’t helpful, I do believe it is, AND there are times when the work that is being called for goes deeper than mindfulness with breath and journaling.

Working out what I am being shown as a place to get messy and dig in is actually going to support me in using mindfulness/the 3 Bs as tools for daily practice of being in relationship with my teens, WITHOUT bringing in the baggage of what I am holding from my own past…

It’s like when I work with teachers, I get to facilitate PDC, which is super useful all of the kids, and there are a small percentage of the kids that need more, right? For various reasons, there are some kids in the classroom that need more, they need a team, they need creative problem solving that is a bit more out of the box than the majority. 

That is where I am at right now on my own journey, and I need a team. I have some things to work through, beliefs to reframe, and some validation of my human experience to receive. I get to spend some time digging into my stuff in a way that lets it all come undone, finding a feeling of safety for being with the breakdown, so that I can breakthrough what is on the other side of these limiting beliefs.

Thank you so much for listening…. Please let me know how this show has resonated for you.

:::::

Parenting Teens with Positive Discipline Audio Summit FOREVER PACKAGE 

15 interviews that highlight all the things that show up during the teen years. !5 experts in Positive Discipline who KNOW the world of parenting teens joined me in powerful, useful conversations that I know you will love.

Click here to buy the Forever Package.

:::::

GET THE BOOK!

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child. 

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Oct 1, 2019

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey AUDIOBOOK will be available just in time for the Back to school season – it’s summer now, but soon we will all be looking at the transitions that come with fall. I am confident that the Joyful Courage audiobook will be a supportive companion as you ride it out with your kids – full of stories and tools that will connect you with self and others, the audiobook will be something you can listen to over and over and over again.  Keep staying tuned in for details as we get closer to launch day!! Follow Joyful Coruage on FB and IG, and sign up for my weekly newsletter at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

::::

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

::::

 

My guest today is DR. ROB REIHER.

 

Rob is a highly respected developmental and educational psychologist.  He is a media expert who studies the escalating impact of tech, media and consumerism and it’s accompanying “noise” on children, families and society.

 

Also, Rob has extensive experience as a researcher, counselor, speaker, consultant, and educator.  As an adjunct professor of Psychology at Woodbury University in Burbank California, Rob created and taught the first INNERTAINMENT course in the country.  Rob has written two books and is the co-author (with Daniel Acuff Ph.D.) of Kidnapped: How Irresponsible Marketers Are Stealing the Minds of Your Children. He is also the co-host of the Live Above the Noise podcast.

I am thrilled to have Dr. Reiher on to support us in developing tools for this landscape of parenting.

:::::

 

Parenting Teens with Positive Discipline Audio Summit FOREVER PACKAGE

 

15 interviews that highlight all the things that show up during the teen years. !5 experts in Positive Discipline who KNOW the world of parenting teens joined me in powerful, useful conversations that I know you will love.

 

Click here to buy the Forever Package.

 

:::::

 

GET THE BOOK!

 

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

 

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

 

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

 

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

 

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

 

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Sep 24, 2019

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey AUDIOBOOK will be available just in time for the Back to school season – it’s summer now, but soon we will all be looking at the transitions that come with fall. I am confident that the Joyful Courage audiobook will be a supportive companion as you ride it out with your kids – full of stories and tools that will connect you with self and others, the audiobook will be something you can listen to over and over and over again.  Keep staying tuned in for details as we get closer to launch day!! Follow Joyful Coruage on FB and IG, and sign up for my weekly newsletter at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

::::

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

:::: 

Today’s guest is Natha Campanella.  She is a professional writer, a mother, a teacher, an astrologer and intuitive guide. Natha is also a certified master life coach and she uses a unique blend of modalities and her approach with an emphasis on traditional coaching and astrology. She often supplements with knowledge from the enneagram. We will be discussing  astrology. Join us!

"There's something that is very objective about astrology and also very validating.”

“The beautiful thing about astrology it is that it is so similar to the way that we as humans just navigate the world.”

“Meeting them where they're at is understanding who they are, and then working with them from that place.”

What you’ll hear in this episode:

  • How natal charts are created and what they mean 
  • What archetypes are and what they do
  • How a chart is laid out and what each section symbolizes
  • Ways your sign can influence your approach to life 
  • How you can use your astrological information to shape your choices
  • Astrological insights as additional, objective, non-judgmental information for self-exploration
  • Why charting your family can be helpful
  • Astrology as a means to meet your kids where they are at
  • How astrology can interface with or be complementary to positive or peaceful parenting
  • Using astrological information to navigate parenting challenges
  • Astrology and the iceberg metaphor
  • Resources for understanding astrology
  • Ways to work with Natha

What does Joyful Courage mean to you?

I think joyful courage means to me that, you know, even when stuff feels really hard, which it does a lot. Especially, I don't know for the rest of you, but for me, that there's always this sort of invitation to be courageous and keep moving forward and to really look for what is joyful within the context of what's happening. And I always find really amazing things even when I'm, you know, having a dark night of the soul. It's like "Oh, you know, look at how beautiful that bumblebee looks on that flower right now" and so you know, it's like always just seeking out, always knowing that there is something beautiful happening and that can bring joy.

Resources:

Caroline Myss - Sacred Contracts 

Astro.com

The Inner Sky

Jan Spiller

Where to find:

Website | Facebook | Instagram | YouTube 

:::::

Joyful Courage Academy Parenting Teens

September 30th – November 1st

The program consists of weekly content – and I am taking what I have been sharing as audio and adding a “webinar-ish” component for those of you that are visual learners – an active community, and a 90 minute one on one call with me to go deep into what your individual challenges are. YES! I am only taking 15 people in each track so if you are into it head over to www.joyfulcourage.com/jcapt right now and get yourself registered.

This program is an investment. It is an investment in time and money. And considering what we tend to easily spend money on, isn’t THIS, our relationship with our growing kids, worth the investment???

www.joyfulcourage.com/jcapt check it out and make it happen, space is limited.

::::: 

Parenting Teens with Positive Discipline Audio Summit FOREVER PACKAGE

15 interviews that highlight all the things that show up during the teen years. !5 experts in Positive Discipline who KNOW the world of parenting teens joined me in powerful, useful conversations that I know you will love.

Click here to buy the Forever Package.

:::::

GET THE BOOK!

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join 

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Sep 17, 2019

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey AUDIOBOOK will be available just in time for the Back to school season – it’s summer now, but soon we will all be looking at the transitions that come with fall. I am confident that the Joyful Courage audiobook will be a supportive companion as you ride it out with your kids – full of stories and tools that will connect you with self and others, the audiobook will be something you can listen to over and over and over again.  Keep staying tuned in for details as we get closer to launch day!! Follow Joyful Coruage on FB and IG, and sign up for my weekly newsletter at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

::::

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

::::

 Hello! You have found yourself listening to Joyful Courage – and conscious parenting podcast, where we talk about the everyday challenges of parenting and HUMANING in a real and transparent way – I am your host, Casey O’Roarty. I am a Positive Discipline trainer and parent coach doing my very best to raise my own two teens agers in a way that grows their internal sense of being the creators of their own lives, and supporting other parents in doing the same with their kids.

The interviews and solo shows you will hear on this podcast are my explorations of how to be as authentic and mindful as we can be, while treating the fellow humans in our life, small and big, with the dignity and respect they all deserve.

If you like what you hear, please rate and review this show on apple podcasts. And stay tune till the end of the show to hear about how you can join the Joyful Courage community online.

::::

Yay! I’m back! I’ve missed you all!!! It isn’t often that I take time off of this podcast, and I am really grateful to have taken the past few weeks off.

Some of the things that went down included:

  • Working with three elementary schools here in Bellingham! Supporting the staff members with implementing Positive Discipline in the classroom

    • Shout out to teachers – they are on the font lines of making the world a better place, and just like all of us, doing the best they can with the tools they have. I have worked with many teachers doing the PD trainer, and I have come across some that are deeply discouraged, and others that are super encouraged and what they all have in common is that they show up each day for the kids in their class. And I just want to say that the ways that parents treat their children’s teacher makes all the difference. Build that relationship – it will benefit not only your child, but all the children in your child’s class because a teacher that feels connected to the families he or she serves is going to show up better – belonging and significance are not only what our kids need, it is what all humans need.

  • I launched the Parenting Teens with Positive Discipline Audio Summit Encore Offer!

    • I just couldn’t put these conversations to rest – they were so rich. I know that the whole online summit formula is to give you way more than you can consume in a short period of time and then sell you the whole thing so that you can actually get what you need at your own pace. I followed that formula last time and it felt weird…. I do need to make a living people, and the content I create does have significant value, and….  This felt weird to me. So what I did was I distilled down the content so that it is in bite sized pieces. And omg, going through these audios again was so amazing – I am in a different place than when I recorded these interviews and it really speaks into how our lenses, or our listening, changes over time….  Anyways, I had over 200 people tune into the summit and the feedback was so great!!!  If you missed it, I *am* selling the package, with all the interviews in full, for a limited time on my website. $49.

  • Another significant thing that went down in the last few weeks is that MY SON HAS STARTED AT HIS NEW SCHOOL!!! 

    • Remember, we moved? Do you remember that my son was not so excited? Actually, he was pretty pissed about the whole thing and had a pretty low key summer up here, worrying about what his new school and life was going ot look like.

      He did make one friend prior to school starting here in the neighborhood. Shout out to Leona who saw my post in the neighborhood moms FB group about looking for another 8th grader who likes basketball to hand out with my son and got in touch. They hit it off and it made a world of difference for Ian to have a friend walking into the first day.

      And just as I suspected, he was fine. Better than fine, he was like a celebrity. And that is how it’s been since school started. He is building a friend group full of really sweet, kind kids. I get to trust his judge of character and remember that Ian likes to be around kids that are nice and fun. Yay. Big exhale there.

 So the family is settling in well up here in Bellingham, super happy about the big move….

Today I want to talk about something that I brought to the Joyful Courage Super Fam group recently. Just to remind you, the Super Fam is a group of listeners who find so much value in the podcast that they are willing to give $10/month as a way of saying thank you. They have all received a half hour coaching call with me, and get to participate in a weekly FB Live that I do in our private group. If you are interested in finding out more, go to www.joyfulcourage.com and click the donate button on the navigation bar.

So anyways, I wanted to share what I was teasing apart with the group today for the podcast….

It’s the whole idea of “meeting our kids where they’re at” - We hear these words, but do we really know what they mean?

I really was reminded, over and over again as I curated the interviews for the teen summit, that relationship is everything. Relationship matters people. And often relationship is the starting place for any kind of problem solving/solution finding to happen. We have to pay attention to relationship. Its super foundational, right?

And sometimes, our kids behavior has more to do with how they are feeling inside of relationship with us than anything else – so doing the work to be connected, non-judemental, curious, present, vulnerable, transparent and honest makes a huge difference.

Plus, when our kids are having a hard time, and the relationship isn’t there, the idea that we can meet them where they’re at just isn’t possible. It isn’t possible. Our kids feel met when they feels seen and heard and understood.

So yes, PSA for building relationship. Do it. Work on it al the time. Ask your kids how they know that you love them. Ask them what they think YOU think about them. Get curious to find out what their experience is of you and then listen without talking. Listen. Take it in. And adjust accordingly….

Ok. Back to meeting them where they’re at.

When our kids are having a hard time, when humans are having a hard time – they don’t want to be fixed, and cajoled out of their experience, they want to feel felt. They want to know that you are there with them. They want to know that you see them in their experience. And if your kids are teenagers – they DON’T want to hear what you think about it.

I repeat – teenagers DO NOT want your opinion. They just want you to see them.

Believe me, this is tough. Because I have a lot of opinion. I am a fixer – you have heard me say this before. I am a coach – I COACH PEOPLE TO CREATE RESULTS IN THEIR LIVES AND RELATIONSHIPS – why the HELL wouldn’t my kids want me to coach them????

Oh right, I am their mom.

 And they’re teenagers.

Meeting our kids where they’re at is being present inside of an open mind. Allowing yourself (yes you, parent) to be in the space of not knowing, not judging, not opinion-ing, simply BEING with your child.

Now, there may be some mirroring – “you really thought you would get that job and you didn’t” or “you were playing with that game and your brother came over and grabbed it” or “you were telling a story at dinner and were interrupted” – stating what you are hearing out loud for your child to hear.

There may be some validating of feelings, “I bet that feels discouraging” or “that must have been annoying” or “I’m wondering if that hurt your feelings?” but remember that you are just MAKING A GUESS HERE. And that ALL FEELINGS THEY ARE HAVING ARE VALID.

Because, if you are a normal parent, there has probably been a time where you child has shared what is bothering them and how they are feeling and you may have dismissed it or told them “you don’t have to feel that way” or some other you’re -getting-it-wrong kind of response. We all do this from time to time when we are less that conscious of what we are doing. Not judging, just highlighting. And you may have been right – AND the way our kids feel about their experiences are incredibly valid to them, and dismissing that is just plain RUDE.

Yup. Meeting them where they’re at sometimes requires us to not say what we want to say. Sometimes it requires patience and waiting for the opportunity to ask permission. “Can I share an idea with you?” or “Can I tell you what I think?” and being ok with them saying “no” or “not right now”

You all know about the flipping of the lid – the brain science of when we are triggered and don’t have access to our thoughtful, logical mind. If you don’t, go to www.joyfulcourage.com/teachbrain to find out more.

Brain science tells us that meeting our kids or any human where there as is really about being with them during their hard time. That the being with is actually what will build the bridge back to that logical, thoughtful brain, and open the space for our kids to have problems solving conversations or simply to open up more to us about what is going on in their life.

Meeting them where they’re at is about where they are in the moment. The moment holds so much information too, right?

And I think next level is recognizing what is happening for US in the moment. In PD this is the first step for finding the Belief Behind the Behavior.

 Are we annoyed as a response to their behavior? Angry? Hurt? Hopeless??  Let’s get clear on the ways we are feelilng, like, deep down, and we can start to understand what is going on for them….  Feeling annoyed typically means our kids are feeling disconnected and are looking to be recognized and acknowledged, feeling angry, like our hackles get raised typically means that our kids are feeling powerless and are looking for control where they can get it – hurt? You can guess that our kids are hurting and passing it along…. Hopeless? That is an indicator that our kids are feeling significantly less than perfect and would rather you not take time to notice…. 

Now, this isn’t our child or teen being naughty, bad, or misbahving, this is our child or teen navigated their world using the lens they have. So this INFORMATION can help us meet them where they are at to connect and be present to what they need.

So good. And it takes work. It requires we adults do what we need to do to have a clear enough mind to recognize what is happening when it’s happening, you know what I mean?

 But but but – my teen is so disrespectful, or they’re lying, or they just don’t care….  Meet them where they are. Be with them. Deepen and nurture the relationship you have with them. Support them in feeling felt. Validate them – and then use curiosity to understand even deeper and find solutions that are useful to them.

WHEW!!!!!!!

I know….

So I have a resource for you. If you are listening and nodding your head and thinking yes yes yes and I could use some support IVE GOT YOU!

I am running the JCA again. This will be the fourth round of this, the third time I have focused on teens. But this time there will be two tracks – those of you with tweens and preteens, I see you and I am hearing your feedback. I am going to run a track for parents with kids in middle school as well as a track for kids with older, high school and beyond kids.

The program will start September 30th and registration is open now.

Go to my website – joyfulcourage.com/jcapt and dial it in. The program consists of weekly content – and I am taking what I have been sharing as audio and adding a “webinar-ish” component for those of you that are visual learners – an active community, and a 90 minute one on one call with me to go deep into what your individual challenges are. YES! I am only taking 15 people in each track so if you are into it head over to www.joyfulcourage.com/jcapt right now and get yourself registered.

This program is an investment. It is an investment in time and money. And considering what we tend to easily spend money on, isn’t THIS, our relationship with our growing kids, worth the investment???

www.joyfulcourage.com/jcapt check it out and make it happen, space is limited.

Thank you for listening!!!  You can always get MORE Joyful Courage by following me on IG and FB and joining the conversation in my FB Groups – Live and love with Joyful Courage and Joyful Courage for Parents of Teens. Check out my website for more offers like my BOOK, soon to be in AUDIOBOOK FORMAT, one on one coaching and the archive of this podcast.

Signing off for today my friends and leaving you with this ….pause, take a deep breath, ride it into your body, step up to the balcony seat and trust that everything is going to be ok.

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Parenting Teens with Positive Discipline Audio Summit FOREVER PACKAGE

15 interviews that highlight all the things that show up during the teen years. !5 experts in Positive Discipline who KNOW the world of parenting teens joined me in powerful, useful conversations that I know you will love.

Click here to buy the Forever Package.

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GET THE BOOK!

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Aug 20, 2019

HEYYYY!!

This isn't a full episode - just a quick announcement letting listeners know that the show is going to take a month off and come back strong September 17th - woop woop.

Listen in and find out how to stay connected.

Big love,

Casey

Aug 14, 2019

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey AUDIOBOOK will be available just in time for the Back to school season – it’s summer now, but soon we will all be looking at the transitions that come with fall. I am confident that the Joyful Courage audiobook will be a supportive companion as you ride it out with your kids – full of stories and tools that will connect you with self and others, the audiobook will be something you can listen to over and over and over again.  Keep staying tuned in for details as we get closer to launch day!! Follow Joyful Coruage on FB and IG, and sign up for my weekly newsletter at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

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Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

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Today is a SOLO SHOW!

First, how about a community celebration for the 200TH EPISODE of the Joyful Courage Podcast!!!  WOOP WOOP!! It is so exciting to reach this milestone with you all...  Along with the fact that the podcast has been downloaded over 550,000 times!! I am so deeply grateful and honored that I get to show up for you each week and that what I create is useful to you....

In honor of the 200th show, I actually have a BRAND NEW SOLO SHOW to share this week. I got some pretty powerful feedback from my teen daughter about my parenting style and the messages she is getting through how I show up and talk to her.

Granted, we are navigating some new territory, and have recently been in some tricky discussions. And at the end of the day, I don't always know what the right thing to do is...  You out there with teens may know what I mean, the conversation may sound like this:

Teenager: "But, why can't I ___?"

Parent (racking brain for the perfect , logical answer):  "I'm not sure, mostly ___ just feels like it should be a hard no...."

And then you are left feeling like maybe you are holding on to old beliefs, or perhaps it is what other people will think that is getting in the way, or maybe you are having one of those "can you just not tell me and get a little sneaky" moments (yes, these thoughts exist for me too).

While we all want open, honest relationships with our kids - the open honesty brings with it a BUNCH of challenges that catch you off guard. 

And honestly, I don't always know the right answer, it's not always neat and tidy over here, AND, it turns out, sometimes my daughter feels like a a giving permission, when really, I am just unsure of what to say do. 

You guys. It is so messy.

And this is what I am sharing on the podcast this week. I hope you love it. 

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Parenting Teens with Positive Discipline Audio Summit ENCORE OFFER

The Parenting Teens with Positive Discipline Audio Summit first went live in January of 2019. I gave participants each interview in its entirety, for a week of learning. It was a LOT of content for busy overwhelmed parents, so I built a curated navigation system, to help guide and support and I am sharing with you.

I have organized some of the many powerful messages from the interviews and complied them around the themes that are important to get us started.

Those themes include:

  • Hot topics like screens, sex, body image, risky behavior

  • Deepening our understanding of this time of life, for both your teen and you, as a parent

  • Strategies for maintaining and nurturing your relationship

  • Settling in when it gets messy

  • Doing our work to get out of their way

The Encore Offer is my gift - free to you.  I think this wisdom is so important, I wanted to share with as many parents as possible.  And I encourage you to share with others!

We will have more opportunities to discuss working together, but for the time being, I recommend just start by  registering and join this learning experience.

Register now: http://www.joyfulcourage.com/tsfall19

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GET THE BOOK!

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey 

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child. 

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

Jul 30, 2019

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey AUDIOBOOK will be available just in time for the Back to school season – it’s summer now, but soon we will all be looking at the transitions that come with fall. I am confident that the Joyful Courage audiobook will be a supportive companion as you ride it out with your kids – full of stories and tools that will connect you with self and others, the audiobook will be something you can listen to over and over and over again.  Keep staying tuned in for details as we get closer to launch day!! Follow Joyful Coruage on FB and IG, and sign up for my weekly newsletter at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

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Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

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Hey friends! Welcome back to Joyful Courage – a conscious parenting podcast, where we get real and raw about the parenting journey. You have tuned in to another SUMMER SERIES EPISODE!!  This week I am super excited to bring back my conversation from TWO YEARS AGO, Episode 98, with Kerry Foreman. I am THRILLED to be sharing this conversation with you. Kerry is someone that I follow on Instagram and am continuously inspired by how she shows up in the world.

Kerry has an online program for teens that is based in mindfulness.  It is a 4 week research based course will allow your teen to develop beginning mindfulness skills and cultivate a mindfulness practice that will reduce stress and improve their mental health. Your teen will become empowered to take control of their well being, become more aware of thoughts and behaviors leading to higher accountability, increase their self esteem, and find an inner happiness not attached to anything external.

Kerry Foreman is a Registered Psychotherapist, with her Masters in Clinical Mental Health Counseling. She is passionate about Mindfulness and has been practicing and teaching for 4 years. Kerry lives in Monument, Colorado with her patient husband, a teenager, a tween and two rescue dogs, Norman and Fern.  Through using Mindfulness to increase her self awareness, she realized that during her childhood she had learned and practiced faulty coping skills. She targeted them one by one, and slowly changed the cycles of her family, learned new behaviors, and worked to create new, positive habits for life. She did this in order to have a successful marriage and to be the kind of Mom she wanted to be. She is passionate about her ability to create change. Change your thinking and it changes your life.

What you’ll hear in this episode:

  • Recognition of FOO (Family of Origin) patterns and the call to make changes
  • Psychological/verbal/emotional abuse trains us react rather than respond
  • Noticing patterns such as shame, guilt and anger – where do they originate?
  • Becoming a parent can bring these to the surface. How do we recognize where we need to change?
  • Learning to respond instead if react
  • Understand and reflect on our own parents’ experience
  • Creating change and becoming aware of our own inner state of being
  • Mindfulness practice influences the shift into better relationships
  • How do we become grounded in order to stay balanced and present in mind no matter what is happening around us?
  • Where control plays a role in mindfulness and the contrast in anxiety
  • What do we chose to believe – what is the story we play in our minds?
  • Self talk of being a victim – recognizing the language
  • Expectations of others and how to stay mindful and in control while at the same time releasing what we are not in control of.

What does Joyful Courage mean to me?

“Joyful Courage is finding the joy in being brave enough to parent differently. Finding a new path in order to allow our kids to be who they were meant to be.”

Where to find Kerry:

YouTube l Facebook l Twitter l BLOG

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Upcoming Programs from Joyful Courage

Hey all, just reminding you that I am getting ready for the fall. I have decided to RE-RELEASE the Parenting Teens with Positive Discipline Audio Summit in September, and then follow it with TWO Academy tracks in October – one for the 12-14ish crowd, and another for the parents of 15-18+ kids.

The summit is 15 interviews released over the course of a week. You have access during that week to listen. You also will have the option to purchase the interviews if you would like unlimited access. 

The Joyful Courage Academy is a FIVE WEEK course is a learning opportunity for parents of teens that includes content, community and a powerful one on one call with me.

I am so excited!!!  Make sure that you are all signed up for my newsletter so that you get all the info about how to sign up!!  www.joyfulcourage.com/join

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And don’t forget there are lots of powerful convos happening over in the Live and Love with Joyful Courage and the Joyful Courage Parents of Teens group on FB – ask to join!

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GET THE BOOK!

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child. 

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Jul 23, 2019

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey AUDIOBOOK will be available just in time for the Back to school season – it’s summer now, but soon we will all be looking at the transitions that come with fall. I am confident that the Joyful Courage audiobook will be a supportive companion as you ride it out with your kids – full of stories and tools that will connect you with self and others, the audiobook will be something you can listen to over and over and over again.  Keep staying tuned in for details as we get closer to launch day!! Follow Joyful Coruage on FB and IG, and sign up for my weekly newsletter at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

::::

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

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Hey friends! Welcome back to Joyful Courage – a conscious parenting podcast, where we get real and raw about the parenting journey. You have tuned in to another SUMMER SERIES EPISODE!!  This week I am bringing back my conversation with Kim Muench. Kim has been on the show a couple of times, but this episode we dig into how the parenting teens experience can really feel like a tight rope walk. Consider the content of LAST WEEK’s show, I thought it would be helpful to share this conversation.

 

Kim is a JAI Institute for Parenting certified parenting coach who works with moms of preteens and teenagers. She is the mother of 5 kids ages 13-31. She writes about conscious parenting, provides one on one coaching and workshops to help support moms towards intentional parenting. We are discussing detaching from the outcome. Join us!

What you’ll hear in this episode:

- When children arrive at adolescence
- The balance of boundaries and relationship building with our teens
- Choosing your battles
- Defining your family values
- Setting an example for your kids
- Defining non-negotiables
- Ways to offer choices to your teenager
- Detaching from the outcome
- Prioritizing personal care and personal development
- The illusion of control
- Individuation and what that can look like
- Supporting our kids in making better choices with alcohol
- Being okay with kids failing or things taking longer
- Trusting vs hovering - learning to detach
- Taking a long view to your relationship with your kids

What does Joyful Courage mean to you?

Joyful Courage means to me enthusiastically embracing and supporting the journey of our sons and daughters that have come into the world to live out their journey. Supporting and encouraging them with enthusiasm. And I love the two words together, I think it’s fantastic.

Resources:

Episode 82: Tweens and Smart Phones

Where to find:

Website | Facebook | Twitter | Facebook Group Real Life Parenting Community

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Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

 

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

 

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

 

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

 

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

 

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Jul 16, 2019

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

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Today I am bringing back my conversation with Liz Blackwell-Moore from episode 128. Liz and I go deep into the conversation of substance use and abuse and how to be in relationship with our kids while also navigating the very real decisions they may or may not decide to make. I know, this topic is tough. We all want our kid to be safe and healthy…. And we all feel the fear around the very real risks some of them take. This conversation is powerful and left me feeling more grounded about this super intense part of the parenting teens journey. Check it out.

Alright - My guest today is Liz Blackwell-Moore. I connected with Liz through my friend, and one of your fave podcast guests, Julietta Skoog from besproutable.com. I am so excited to have Liz on today to talk about an incredibly relevant topic – kids and drugs. GAH. I know. No one really WANTS to talk about this, but we have to.

Liz has been working in the field of substance use since 2000. Her current work involves working with community coalitions and organizations to provide training on prevention strategies as well as technical assistance to translate public health research into practice and implement a restorative trauma-informed approach to addressing public health problems.

So basically, Liz is going to break it all down for us in a way that is helpful.  She lives in Portland, Maine with her wife, two happy kids, and a puppy.

Content:

 

  • Liz shares about her early work with people involved with substance abuse and was drawn to exploring prevention work
  • How can we make “systems” (including the family) better for young people, with more support in their lives?
  • What the “risk taking years” feels like, according to Casey
  • Liz shares her moms’ analogy of the two boats
  • Adolescent brain development
    • It’s like a house being build bottom up
    • Built through interactions and the environment kids experience
    • Reward center develops first – ready to go, “volume turned up”
    • Front, logical part of brain not fully developed, and not integrated
    • W/o the desire to try new things, how would they ever leave home??
  • The perception and science of marijuana and adolescence
    • National Academy of Sciences – research on the research
      • Young people using
        • Impacts learning and memory
        • Significant effects on mental health
          • “Regular use” – once every 30 days
          • 2xs more likely to become depressed
          • 3xs more likely to have suicidal thoughts
          • Kids with MH issues are more likely to use/self-medicate
        • Initially make people feel calm/relaxed
          • Brain likes to do what’s easy so eventually wants more
        • What about vaping
          • Tobacco companies are SO LAME – trying to suck in kids
          • Some kids just the flavoring
            • Not regulated – we don’t know what is in it
          • Lots of kids ARE putting nicotine and weed into the vape
        • All drugs impact the reward center of the brain – putting young people at a greater risk of addiction later in life
          • Rewires/primes the brain for addiction
        • How do we get them to wait????
        • Relationship is the most powerful tool we have… Share our values… AND – THEY HAVE CRAZY REWARD CENTERS!!! GAH!!!
          • Be present, listen, develop a strong relationship
          • Set clear expectations – bring it up in a variety of ways
          • Continue to bring it back to what their goals are, how might risky behavior get in the way?
          • Help them to “see” the bigger picture
          • Restorative practices: Hold them accountable while offering support
            • What are you getting out of this?
            • What were you thinking?
            • How else can you get thrills?
            • Social connection?
            • Is this a mental health issue?
          • Having these conversations REQUIRES the adults to be in solid relationship with their kids
          • Also, our stuff shows up and gets in the way – fear, rigidity
          • Ok to say, “this is disappointing” “this is hard for me” – they need to know how they are impacting their parents
          • Teens aren’t great with nuance
          • SLEEP MATTERS!!
          • Natural consequences are powerful
          • Boundaries are MESSY
          • How do we balance nurture and structure?? It’s a dance
          • How do we know when it really is a problem?
            • Major changes in physical appearance
            • Personality
            • Participation
            • Peer group changes
            • Public image has changed
          • org – online resources
          • 20-minute guide – helping parents use motivational interviewing 20inuteguide.com
          • Find your people!
          • There is uncertainty and change AND we all have flexible, learning brains – we can be resilient!!

What does Joyful Courage mean to you?

For me it means trying to see those amazing things that are happening as you move through adolescence – having the courage to stick with your values and follow our instincts…

Resources:
https://the20minuteguide.com/
http://www.drugfree.org/

Good reading on the teen brain:
Dan Siegel Brainstorm
Francis Jensen The Teenage Brain

Links for young people:
http://www.teen.drugabuse.gov/
*This is National Institute of Drug Abuse website for teens

http://www.protectwhatsnext.com/
*This is a website out of Colorado for young people specifically about marijuana use

Where to find Liz:

Birchlanestrategies.com (under-construction)
Linked in

 

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Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

 

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

 

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

 

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

 

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

 

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Jul 9, 2019

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

::::

Today we are going wayyyyy back to revisit Episode 21, my conversation with Jessica Lahey about what it means to be an “autonomy supportive” parents.

This was such a powerful revisit for me, four years later, as my kids settle into the teen years and all the challenges and celebrations they get to navigate. I would love to take away the pain and confusion that comes with this time – AND I know that my kids will have their deepest learning through experience…

Such a great conversation!

Jessica Lahey is smart and funny and real when it comes to talking straight up about how we rob our kids of their future when we protect the from failure...

 

It doesn't matter if they are in the sandbox or a high school classroom, our kids only learn the tools for relationship, empathy and resiliency when we (parents) allow them the gift of discomfort, making mistakes and yes, failure.

Listen in to this candid conversation and consider where you could pull back a bit, where you could allow your kids a little bit more room to learn from their missteps, to own when they've hurt someone, to problem solve it when they've left their homework or lunch at home (again!)...

We all love our kids, we want them to grow into the fullest, best versions of themselves, sometimes that requires us to back off and let them figure some things out...  You may be surprised by just how capable they are!

Mentions:

The book: The Gift of Failure by Jessica Lahey
The article in the Atlantic that started it all: Why Parents Need to Let Their Children Fail
Why Back to School Night Made Me Feel Like a Bad Mom
Glennon Doyle Melton on momastry.com 
How to Raise and Adult by Julie Lythcott-Haims
The Price of Privilege by Madeline Levine

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Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

 

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

 

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

 

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

 

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

 

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Jul 3, 2019

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

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Today we are going to revisit Episode 138, my conversation with Genevieve Simperingham about what peaceful parenting during the teen years looks like.

Genevieve Simperingham is a counsellor, an AWARE parenting educator, a writer, a group facilitator, meditation teacher and founder of the Peaceful Parent Institute in New Zealand. Over the last 24 years, Genevieve has presented hundreds of workshops and courses. She has parented her own kids using attachment principles and she seeks to empower parents with the tools that result in increased harmony, trust and cooperation in the family unit. We are discussing peaceful parenting our teenagers. Join us!

“It’s about bringing into your parenting not just how you should respond in this situation or in that situation and our different approaches and techniques (which are really, really important) but it’s all about who we are as a person and who our child is as a person and the dynamic and the energy between us.”

“We shouldn’t be in fighter stance simply because we have teenagers.”

What you’ll hear in this episode: 

  • What is peaceful parenting and how it is different than some of the more mainstream behaviorist parenting approaches.
  • The Centre, Connect, Communicate approach
  • Stress management, self care and healing trauma and how they relate to parenting
  • The need for authenticity in empathy and curiosity
  • The biggest hang-ups for parents around peaceful parenting teenagers
  • Having tough conversations with your teens without shorting out the connection at the outset
  • Setting and holding limits within the peaceful parenting framework
  • Sex, drugs and alcohol use in teens - is it better to allow at home or to restrict?
  • Reducing power struggles and rebellion
  • Educating and empowering teens to make their own choices
  • Reconnecting to move past conflict

What does Joyful Courage mean to you?

Joyful courage to me, it connects me with that last bit that we were just talking about, to me it’s about joy we feel in the heart and it takes a lot of courage to reconnect. So to me it’s about opening the heart and allowing the joy, the enjoyment of the relationship, of the connection to come back in and that takes courage. It takes courage to be vulnerable again. It’s easier to be hard and defensive and stern and it takes courage to open the heart come back to the joy of that beautiful connection again.

Resources:

Aware parenting

Where to find Genevieve:

The way of the Peaceful Parent Facebook Group
Facebook
Website

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Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

 

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Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Jun 25, 2019

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

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Today’s show is a revisit of Episode 57,  my conversation with Sharon Ballantine.

With 3 children to parent, Sharon turned to books for help with parenting, but she never had the time to read and process the information in the books. So, with no other options available to her, she decided to rely on her own intuition and her own Internal Guidance System for parenting. She began using this technique and the law of attraction to manifest exactly what she wanted as a parent. In this episode, Sharon shares exactly how she made it all happen!

 

Sharon Ballantine is a Parenting and Life Coach and Founder of the Ballantine Parenting Institute. Her book, The Art of Blissful Parenting, guides parents with practical as well as spiritual advice in raising their children. It also guides parents on how to get into alignment, discover and use their own IGS before they can teach their children.

In this episode Sharon also discusses:

  • How to find answers within yourself
  • You have an internal guidance system that begins with your feelings
  • Why leaving the room can help you get “in alignment” to parent
  • Physical movement can be a tool to help bring you into a centered place of alignment
  • Changing the subject that is causing stress and bad energy can cause a shift in energy
  • The teenage years are the years of “personal discovery”
  • Parents spend the teen years in fear mode and resort to using control
  • Whoever a teenager is today is not their final destination. Be patient; they will change.
  • Why we want to avoid making our children feel bad at all costs
  • Staying centered will give you the coping skills to deal with any kind of crazy you have to deal with
  • “This too shall pass” - it is true especially for teens
  • Ways to deal with teen behavior that is harmful
  • Focusing on the future and consequences of actions can allow a teen to take responsibility and look at the big picture
  • How to support your child’s development of their Internal Guidance System
  • Ways her failures as a parent contributed to finding her Internal Guidance System
  • What joyful courage means to her and how it contributes to bliss

Resources Mentioned on the Show:

 The Secret - Rhonda Byrne

The Art of Blissful Parenting - Sharon Ballantine

Connect with Sharon:

Website - sharonballantine.com

 Facebook/sharonballantine

Twitter/LifeCoachSB

 

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Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

 

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

 

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

 

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

 

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

 

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Jun 18, 2019

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

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Today’s guest is Shelley Francis. Shelly is an audiologist specializing in auditory processing disorder, and has been working with children for over 25 years. Over the years she has noticed a trend where more and more children are being seen as extra sensitive, not only with their physical senses but with their inner senses as well. By using her own sensitivities, she looks past a child's diagnosis and connects with their heart.

Today Shelly remains motivated by both her passion to help children and her unique perspective in childhood development, which she has described in her book, No Child Left Unwrapped:  Understanding and Honoring the Gifts Every Child is Born With. It's her hope that her book and her teachings will help create the needed paradigm shifts within our education system and within our society that will better support our beautiful sensory sensitive children of today. Join us!

 

“Often we pigeonhole these children thinking that they need to be a certain way to be successful and then they can't be successful because that's not their nature. ”

 

“There's so much more information out there to receive than just information through our five senses.”

 

“Everybody needs to know that they're awesome.”

 

“These children then just feel like there's, there's so much wrong with them, but they're never really getting what's right with them, what's good with them, what's awesome about them.”

 

“Often the problem we see is a solution to a problem that we don't know about”

 

“We are always looking at the external for the answer. What if the answer is someplace else?”

 

“Nobody can deny the fact that we need more people that are empathic or empathetic and compassionate. And that's what we're getting.”

 

“Let's help our kids when they're young or as early as possible so they don't have to go through as much of these challenges that we've had to go through, that other sensitive people have had to go through in the past.”

 

“Entangled trauma for a sensitive soul is a recipe for disaster.”

 

What you’ll hear in this episode:

  • The difference between differences and disorder
  • The need to recognize and honor differences
  • Sensory differences - what are they and how do you recognize them?
  • Sensory information, behavior and how they intersect
  • The challenges of living heart wide open for kids who haven’t learned how to release the energy of others
  • Baby steps for supporting sensitive kids
  • The role of meditation as a tool
  • Resilience: what it means and how we develop it
  • Trauma, sensitivity and visualization to create filters for energy

 

What does Joyful Courage mean to you?

Well it's, it's definitely, you know, joy and courage are two of the beautiful inner gifts that live in our heart. And it's funny you asked that because I, before the interview I actually was was thinking to myself that, you know, I was a little nervous about this. This is all new to me. Putting out a book was new to me, you know, I was very comfortable sitting in my office and having people come to me for so many years and now I'm going out into the world in a different way of being seen and heard and it can cause a little bit of anxiety and you know, nervous about it. But what I thought about was that, you know, tap into my own gifts of the heart and realize that joy and courage help me to get through being nervous about coming out and being seen and heard. So joy and courage are beautiful gifts of the heart that we can develop in our children that can help them navigate this world.

 

Resources:

No Child Left Unwrapped:  Understanding and Honoring the Gifts Every Child is Born With

 

Where to find Shelly:

https://meetshelley.com/

Facebook

 

 

:::::

 

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

 

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

 

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

 

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

 

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

 

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Jun 11, 2019

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

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Hey friends! 

Can’t believe that it is nearly halfway through June!

-       Book launch – IG Giveaway

-       JCA Teens program

-       NASAP and TP

-       Looking ahead at the summer

-       Planning for next fall

o   More JCA Teens

o   Possible JCA Tweens/Preteens

o   Live workshops/classes

Today I want to get back to basics.

I am a Positive Discipline Trainer. My recent time in Tucson at NASAP and co-facilitating the TP has brought me back to the building blocks of positive discipline…. I am also finding myself on exploratory calls with new clients who are eager to do one on one work and looking for resources to share what the philosophy of PD is all about, with the Joyful Courage spin, or course.

So, I decided I would do a show about it. I am excited to share, and if you are someone who feels like you know all about PD, I invite you to listen from a place of curiosity and wonder – to catch yourself when you think “I know all of this” and shift into “what is here for me to learn?”

 Because that is one of my favorite things about this work – there are so many layers. Right when I think “oh yeah, NOW I get it” life throws me something new, or my kids step into a new place of development, or I just simply find myself back in my old ways of thinking (because it is so darn familiar) and I realize, yet again, that there is more to learn….

Excited? Me too.

A lot of people hear the words, Positive Discipline and assume that it is all about being nice while we dole out consequences to our kids. Or they get really stuck on the word “positive “ and think it is all about being permissive and letting our kids run the show. Some people mistakenly believe that PD parents don’t ever want their kids to feel bad, and perhaps lump PD with helicoptering, coddling or enabling our kids.

 This is totally NOT what PD is all about. To start, one thing I really appreciate about Positive Discipline is that it is a program that has it’s roots in Adlerian Psychology. Alfred Adler was one of the first social psychologists. He worked with individuals and families and found, time and time again, that human behavior was motivated by a sense of belonging and significance. He found that we are always moving towards, or moving from, our sense of connection and knowing that we matter.  And when behavior starts to look like mischief, it can be linked back to the individuals perception of belonging and significance. Jane Nelsen, the author and co-author of the library of Positive Discipline books, talks about belonging and significance as our longing for love and responsibility.

 

-       Kind and firm

-       Belonging and significance

-       Mutual respect/dignity for all

-       Encouragement

-       Social interest

-       Take time for training

-       The courage to be imperfect/mistakes as opportunities to learn

-       We always have a choice

:::::

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

 This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

 Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

Jun 4, 2019

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

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Today’s guest is Lahana Vigliano. Lahana is a certified clinical nutritionist and CEO of Thrival Nutrition. She has her Bachelor's degree in Nutrition Science and currently is pursuing her Master's degree in Nutrition Science. Lahana and her team help support women who struggle with weight loss, hormone imbalances, digestive issues, chronic fatigue, and many other lingering issues that leaves women not feeling their best. She uses food as medicine as well as herbs and supplements when needed to support her clients. She looks at the whole body holistically, making sure women are understanding how nutrition, sleep, stress, and their environment impact their health. She creates tons of free resources on her blog, www.thrivalnutrition.com. We’re going to be discussing nutrition and stress. Join us!

 

“In the question of “Am I doing enough?” We often are actually doing too much..”

“Everybody's going to be okay if their schedule isn't completely jam-packed.”

“We miss self-care opportunities just because we aren't in the mindset of recognizing that we're having a self-care opportunity”

“Change isn't going to happen just because you want it to happen, but it will happen when we step into action.”

 

What you’ll hear in this episode:

  • What is cortisol and what does it do?
  • How cortisol impacts brain growth in kids
  • Most common stressors among parents
  • How sleep interacts with cortisol
  • Cortisol, appetite, and cravings
  • Self-care and reframing what that looks like
  • How much sleep we should be getting to maintain optimal health
  • Finding time for sleep and self-care
  • The stories we tell ourselves about food
  • Making food prep easier
  • Creating barriers around foods that don’t serve us
  • Easy protein sources
  • Ways to make vegetables more accessible
  • Self-limiting beliefs around the scarcity of time and resources
  • Learning to give yourself grace
  • The power of doing something you love
  • Prioritizing self-care to be able to care for others

 

What does Joyful Courage mean to you?

So I think just, as my life as a mom, a business owner, a wife, I think it just means to really live life to the fullest, you know, having no fear and just being filled with joy with everything that you do, no matter what season, no matter what time in your life because it's meant to be because it's building me up to be the person God created me to be. So I'm just kind of going through life with that mantra.

 

Resources:

Under Pressure by Lisa Damour

Recipes on Lahana’s website

 

Where to find Lahana:

www.thrivalnutrition.com

Facebook

Instagram  

Thrival Nutrition Podcast

 

:::::

 

Joyful Courage: Calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey

 

This book is all about how to show up as a Joyful Courage parent so that you have better access to the tools you need in hot parenting moments – tools that are helpful and maintain connection with your child.

 

THE BOOK IS READY FOR YOU TO BUY– Go to www.joyfulcourage.com/book

 

The best way to stay up to date on the book news is to join my newsletter list, if you haven’t already.  Sign up at www.joyfulcourage.com/join

 

Thank you to everyone that has been so encouraging on this journey!!!  I appreciate you!!!!

 

:::::

Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on Apple Podcast to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

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