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Joyful Courage - A Conscious Parenting Podcast

Joyful Courage is a Conscious Parenting Podcast. Be inspired, entertained and educated as we navigate the challenges and celebrations of choosing to be a conscious parent. Interviews and solo shows will provide listeners with tools, strategies and inspiration that can be directly applied to their parenting journey.
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Now displaying: Category: parenting
Jan 23, 2018

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

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Alright - My guest today is Liz Blackwell-Moore. I connected with Liz through my friend, and one of your fave podcast guests, Julietta Skoog from besproutable.com. I am so excited to have Liz on today to talk about an incredibly relevant topic – kids and drugs. GAH. I know. No one really WANTS to talk about this, but we have to.

Liz has been working in the field of substance use since 2000. Her current work involves working with community coalitions and organizations to provide training on prevention strategies as well as technical assistance to translate public health research into practice and implement a restorative trauma-informed approach to addressing public health problems.

So basically, Liz is going to break it all down for us in a way that is helpful.  She lives in Portland, Maine with her wife, two happy kids, and a puppy.

Content:

  • Liz shares about her early work with people involved with substance abuse and was drawn to exploring prevention work
  • How can we make “systems” (including the family) better for young people, with more support in their lives?
  • What the “risk taking years” feels like, according to Casey
  • Liz shares her moms’ analogy of the two boats
  • Adolescent brain development
    • It’s like a house being build bottom up
    • Built through interactions and the environment kids experience
    • Reward center develops first – ready to go, “volume turned up”
    • Front, logical part of brain not fully developed, and not integrated
    • W/o the desire to try new things, how would they ever leave home??
  • The perception and science of marijuana and adolescence
    • National Academy of Sciences – research on the research
      • Young people using
        • Impacts learning and memory
        • Significant effects on mental health
          • “Regular use” – once every 30 days
          • 2xs more likely to become depressed
          • 3xs more likely to have suicidal thoughts
          • Kids with MH issues are more likely to use/self-medicate
        • Initially make people feel calm/relaxed
          • Brain likes to do what’s easy so eventually wants more
        • What about vaping
          • Tobacco companies are SO LAME – trying to suck in kids
          • Some kids just the flavoring
            • Not regulated – we don’t know what is in it
          • Lots of kids ARE putting nicotine and weed into the vape
        • All drugs impact the reward center of the brain – putting young people at a greater risk of addiction later in life
          • Rewires/primes the brain for addiction
        • How do we get them to wait????
        • Relationship is the most powerful tool we have… Share our values…  AND – THEY HAVE CRAZY REWARD CENTERS!!!  GAH!!!
          • Be present, listen, develop a strong relationship
          • Set clear expectations – bring it up in a variety of ways
          • Continue to bring it back to what their goals are, how might risky behavior get in the way?
          • Help them to “see” the bigger picture
          • Restorative practices: Hold them accountable while offering support
            • What are you getting out of this?
            • What were you thinking?
            • How else can you get thrills?
            • Social connection?
            • Is this a mental health issue?
          • Having these conversations REQUIRES the adults to be in solid relationship with their kids
          • Also, our stuff shows up and gets in the way – fear, rigidity
          • Ok to say, “this is disappointing” “this is hard for me” – they need to know how they are impacting their parents
          • Teens aren’t great with nuance
          • SLEEP MATTERS!!
          • Natural consequences are powerful
          • Boundaries are MESSY
          • How do we balance nurture and structure?? It’s a dance
          • How do we know when it really is a problem?
            • Major changes in physical appearance
            • Personality
            • Participation
            • Peer group changes
            • Public image has changed
          • org – online resources
          • 20-minute guide – helping parents use motivational interviewing 20inuteguide.com
          • Find your people!
          • There is uncertainty and change AND we all have flexible, learning brains – we can be resilient!!

What does Joyful Courage mean to you?

For me it means trying to see those amazing things that are happening as you move through adolescence – having the courage to stick with your values and follow our instincts…

Resources:
https://the20minuteguide.com/
http://www.drugfree.org/

Good reading on the teen brain:
Dan Siegel Brainstorm
Francis Jensen The Teenage Brain

Links for young people:
http://www.teen.drugabuse.gov/
*This is National Institute of Drug Abuse website for teens

http://www.protectwhatsnext.com/
*This is a website out of Colorado for young people specifically about marijuana use

Where to find Liz:

Birchlanestrategies.com (under-construction)
Linked in

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Journey to Joy Ecourse

Journey to Joy is a 3-part offer. 

Each Module contains a video, audio and workbook to guide you in doing your work.

You will increase your awareness around the areas you are stuck (you know, the irritation that never seems to go away... the exhaustion, the guilt and shame that shows up so often after you have "dealt with" the challenges your kids bring on a regular basis.

You will spend time exploring new choices, new ways of being...  Inviting in the qualities that are missing.  Love, compassion, self-acceptance and non-judgement...  You will learn how to open up your body and allow these emotions in.

You will create a practice for teaching your body and mind a NEW pattern, making this new way of being more readily available when you need it.

SO EXCITED to share this with you!  Get more info and register at www.joyfulcourage.com/joy

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All the goods at www.joyfulcourage.com/yes

Intention Bracelets

Back by popular demand!! The Joyful Courage intention bracelets are back in stock and I am THRILLED to have been able to have had the community vote on the reminders that are on them…. Breathe, Pause, Trust, Surrender, Kindness – what do you need?

Joyful Courage SHIRTS

Women cut tanks and tees are ready for you to BUY NOW!!  Wearable reminders for how you want to show up in the world.

DAILY INTENTION CARDS 

What do you think about the Daily Intention Cards???  These cards are designed to support you in your conscious, intentional parenting practice.

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Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on iTunes to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast on iTunes to help me spread the show to an ever-larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Nov 14, 2017

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

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What Fresh Hell Podcast Promo

You can listen to What Fresh Hell on your IOS device, Android or through the website

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 My guest today is Tosha Schore, M.A. Tosha brings a burst of energy and optimism to parenting, and will lift your parenting confidence! She is an expert at simple solutions to what feel like overwhelmingly complicated problems. 

A sought after coach, author and speaker, Tosha is committed to creating a more peaceful world, one sweet boy at a time. Through her online and in-person offerings, she supports parents to care for themselves, connect with their boys deeply, set limits lovingly, and play wildly. 

Tosha is a trainer of Hand in Hand Parenting and co-author with the organization's founder, Patty Wipfler, of "Listen: Five Simple Tools to Meet Your Everyday Challenges." She is also creator of the wildly popular "Parenting Boys Peacefully! A FREE 10-Day Reconnect," and the new online course, "Out With Aggression!" 

You can find Tosha on her website, www.toshaschore.com, and on FB at Tosha Schore, Your Partner In Parenting Boys.

Content:

  • Raising boys in these days of toxic masculinity
  • Taking a hard look at the ways that men are conditioned
  • Creating a more peaceful world, one sweet boy at a time
  • The question of how to help our boys grow into emotionally intelligent men who don’t see women as objects is worldwide
  • How to help our boys grow up to be peaceful – Huff Post article
  • Move beyond the anger and the fear to what we can DO
  • Opportunity shows up in raising our boys
    • We need to teach our boys that there are lots of ways to be close that aren’t sexual
    • It’s ok to talk, cuddle, hold hands – lots of ways of being intimate
  • Documentary of The Mask You Live In
    • Not giving permission to boys for having intimate friendships with other boys
    • Navigating the jockeying for power among boys
  • Redefining what it means to be masculine
  • What is being modeled in the homes for our boys?
  • Increase our own emotional intelligence and pay attention to how we navigate and model our own upset
  • Boys being encouraged to stuff their emotions
  • Not comfortable with allowing our boys the time and space to have feelings
  • Help them feel comfortable with their full array of emotions – not just anger
  • Popular culture isn’t helpful
  • Advocate/ Fight for the right of our boys to have feelings
  • AND advocate for them to make mistakes and learn from them
  • When our boys make mistakes we need to help them
  • Talk about music lyrics and porn and do it when they are YOUNG
  • Amy Lang – parent educator, parenting through our children’s sexual development
  • Start talking to your boys
  • Don’t let your discomfort get in the way of letting our boys be their whole selves
  • Amy’s short video about having convos about sexual harassment/assault with our kids
  • Talking to our kids about standing up to friends who are harassing others
  • Seize opportunities for modeling/showing them what it looks like to “do what’s right”
  • Story of masculinity inside of supporting a woman on Reddit
  • Acknowledging that standing up for what is right is challenging!!
  • Teachable moments are when they make mistakes and getting into mischief
  • Final thoughts – “hurt people hurt people” – boys and men are hurting and therefore hurting others… when we help them heal from their hurts, we are solving the problem

Where to find Tosha:

www.toshaschore.com

10 day reconnect parenting boys peacefully

www.listenthebook.com

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DAILY INTENTION CARDS

What do you think about the Daily Intention Cards???  These cards are designed to support you in your conscious, intentional parenting practice.

Get yours now – http://www.joyfulcourage.com/intentioncards

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Joyful Courage SHIRTS!!

Women cut tanks and tees are ready for you to BUY NOW!!  Wearable reminders for how you want to show up in the world.

Get yours now --> http://www.joyfulcourage.com/jcshirts

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FAMILY MEETING ECOURSE

6 week email course that guides you in setting up the family meeting routine/practice. It is on demand so that as soon as you sign up the emails will begin to show up in your inbox!

Sign up now:

http://www.joyfulcourage.com/family-meeting-ecourse

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Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on iTunes to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast on iTunes to help me spread the show to an ever larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

 

Nov 7, 2017

Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

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Big thanks to the community!  Thank you for listening and supporting the work of Joyful Courage!

Please pass on this show to AT LEAST one person who you think it will land with! Your sharing helps me grow and expand this work – YOU are helping to create the impact and make the world a better place.

Content:

  • I am on the journey with you, I am with you! Highs and lows, you are my peeps!
  • The teen saga continues….
  • Having a teen is like birth, you think you’re so prepared and then…. Reality hits!
  • Teen brain experiences everything so intensely
  • Eps 115 was all about trust and surrender
  • Celebrate the relationship
  • Using and developing breath as a tool
  • 4:45 Our children are our teachers – they picked us!
  • We don’t know what we don’t know and our children highlight that for us
  • Their way of being invites our “stuff” to the surface
  • We then choose how to respond
  • End of the day – they are operating from their developmental place, limited skills, brain development
  • 7:50 Parenting is a never-ending growth and development workshop – we can choose to resist or to grow/evolve
  • 9:15 There is a purpose to this journey
  • Let’s live a life where we are paying attention
  • Our children show us stepping stones to our own growth
  • When we choose into growth and learning we can influence the experience we are having
  • You can only change yourself, you can’t change others
  • Positive Discipline for Teenagers
  • Mistakes our kids make can rock our foundation and philosophy around parenting
  • Being kind and firm at the same time is one of the pillars
  • Peeling back layers of what that ^^ means
  • Kindness only = permissive
  • Firmness only = authoritarian
  • Kind isn’t NICE, it’s connected, firm is respecting ourselves and the situation
  • It’s about progress not perfection, and becoming ever more AWARE of what is happening for us
  • Making agreements is a kind and firm PD parenting tool
  • Get into our child’s world, here what their needs are, share what we need, make a plan together, declare a deadline, follow through (parents)
  • “What was our agreement?”
  • It’s not about being nice while we deliver a consequence…
  • The invitation is to make agreements with YOUR children
  • Not necessarily about the problem we solve, instead it is more about the life skills the kids are practicing inside of the agreement-making
  • Not about finding a solution that lasts forever – every solution has a shelf life

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DAILY INTENTION CARDS


Instagram Followers!!

 What do you think about the Daily Intention Cards???  These cards are designed to support you in your conscious, intentional parenting practice.

Get yours now – http://www.joyfulcourage.com/intentioncards

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FAMILY MEETING ECOURSE

6 week email course that guides you in setting up the family meeting routine/practice. It is on demand so that as soon as you sign up the emails will begin to show up in your inbox!

Sign up now:

http://www.joyfulcourage.com/family-meeting-ecourse

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COACHING WITH CASEY

Are you playing with the idea of one on one coaching? I currently have a few spots available in my schedule and would LOVE to work with you.

Coaching with Casey is a three month commitment. We will explore your vision for parenting and even bigger, how you want to show up for your life. We explore mindset, and how shifts in mindset create big shifts in relationship. And finally, we deep dive into the tools and strategies of Positive Discipline for teaching, modeling and practicing life skills.

Coaching is an investment. If you would like to find out more, and explore the possibility that coaching is a good fit for you, schedule a 20 minute explore call.  Click here and we will schedule our call!

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Be a Subscriber

Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on iTunes to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast on iTunes to help me spread the show to an ever larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

 

Apr 27, 2017

 

** This podcast is marked explicit for a reason!**

So happy to have my friend Rebecca Gallagher,  from frugalistablog.com on this bonus episode to dig into the popular and controversial Netflix series 13 Reasons Why.  Rebecca is raising teens, and like me, watched the show and had powerful discussions about the themes that show up with her daughter.

Rowan and I actually watched the show together.

The themes that show up in 13 Reasons Why, created by Brian Yorkey and based on a book of the same name by Jay Ashor, are heavy, and intense.  Some parents are unsure about whether it is something they want their kids to see.

Rebecca and I don't claim to have answers, but we do discuss our own opinions and experiences we had with sharing the show with our kids and the conversation that showed up because of it.

Topics include sexual assault, bullying, sexual harassment, rape and suicide.  Like I said, intense. AND important to be talking about with the young people in our life.

Let me know what you think!

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MAMACON

Come play with Rebecca and I this SATURDAY, April 29th in Bellevue, WA for the ultimate mama's night out. Click here for more details.

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Weekly FB Lives are happening!!

Join me every Tuesday at 10am pst on the Joyful Courage FB page to hear about a new Positive Discipline tool that you can begin using ASAP.  Even if you are well versed in parenting with PD, you will take a way a renewed commitment and perhaps a deeper understanding of the tool.

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Join the Joyful CourageTribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

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Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on iTunes to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast on iTunes to help me spread the show to an ever larger audience!!

CLICK HERE to watch a video that shows up how to subscribe with your iPhone!

 

Jan 3, 2017

Today’s guest is Ross Greene, an acclaimed author and parenting educator who works with kids with behavioral challenges. We are discussing how collaborative, proactive problem solving can reduce parenting challenges. Join us!

“Kids have information we badly need. If we don’t get that information we are at risk of plunging forward with uninformed solutions based on what we think is going on. Our theories and assumptions are often wrong. If you get what’s the matter wrong, your solution won’t work. The least fallible source of information is the kid.”

What you’ll hear in this episode:

  • The role of problem solving in managing challenging behaviors 
  • Why sticker charts and rationing of privileges doesn’t work for this demographic
  • Making collaborative and proactive solutions work for your family
  • Changing your mission: finding out what is getting in your kid’s way
  • The benefit of a skills based approach – coaching skills improvement through problem solving
  • The difference between control and influence
  • Parenting and education as partnering and helping
  • Collaborative vs unilateral problem solving
  • Prioritizing unmet expectations to plan proactive problem solving
  • Getting out of the heat of the moment in your parenting 
  • Three steps to proactive problem solving
  • The need for realistic, mutually satisfying solutions
  • The danger of too many solutions
  • Differentiating between a failure and a solution that wasn’t mutually beneficial, realistic or incomplete
  • The messy but crucial nature of problem solving
  • Perfection vs improvement over time – being realistic about goals
  • Focusing on the right thing: learning to focus on the root cause of behavior vs the behavior itself. 

What does Joyful Courage mean to you? 

There is courage that comes along with being a parent, a teacher and a staff member and doing something different because what you are finding is that what you are doing now isn’t working. I’m delighted to say that there are many many parents, educators and facilities who have had that courage and they have been remarkably helpful to their children, their students and the children in their care and that should bring them a great deal of joy as well. It takes courage to take a look at what you are doing, think about it, and try to do something differently.

Resources:

The explosive child
Lost at School

Lost and Found

Raising Human Beings

The Drilling Cheat Sheet

The B Team – Facebook Group

Elevate Your Parenting – Facebook Group

Lost & Found – Facebook Group for Educators

Lives in the Balance – Facebook Group for Clinicians

 Where to find Dr. Greene:

Lives In the Balance
Facebook

Twitter

Centre for Collaborative Problem Solving

Dr. Ross Greene

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Register for the LIVING JOYFUL COURAGE membership program TODAY!!  You have until September 7th to get in on the action - SO EXCITED!

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Join the Joyful CourageTribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

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Make sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Joyful Courage Podcast on iTunes to get the latest shows STRAIGHT to your device!!  AND PLEASE rate and review the Joyful Courage Parenting Podcast on iTunes to help me spread the show to an ever larger audience!!

Apr 26, 2016

Welcome! Today’s guest is Ryan Hamilton, one of the co-founders of the “Life of Dad,” a social media network for dads. He is changing how dads are represented in the parenting arena and is helping moms be more effective at sharing parenting tools and tips with their male partners. Let’s jump into conversation with Ryan!

What you’ll hear in this episode:

  • Ryan has been a computer geek/tech guy all of his life; he now sees his son following in his footsteps in those interests.

  • Ryan works full-time in the advertising industry, but runs his business on the sides for dads.

  • Ryan shares how “Life of Dad” evolved from a heart-wrenching personal story of one of the co-founders.

  • The purpose of “Life of Dad” is to enable a father to share his story via social media.

  • Ryan became involved in the endeavor during a tumultuous time in his life, when he was going through a divorce, job loss, financial collapse, and depression.

  • Ryan began blogging about the darker side of parenting.

  • Ryan discusses how trends and parental role expectations have shifted as dads have pushed for change.

  • Many new resources and dad communities are making change and allowing dads to have a voice.

  • Co-parenting has changed in today’s culture of divorce; Ryan shares how he and his ex-wife make it work for them.

  • Ryan decided to make the journey to veganism about two years ago, when he was depressed and suicidal.

  • He began with being vegetarian, but then transitioned on to veganism.

  • The “cleaning up” of his diet branched out to affect all other areas of his life.

  • Ryan’s advice to other dads is to stay in touch, never feel alone, and reach out to your peer groups. Check out the resources below!

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Resources:

Life of Dad - Website I Twitter I Facebook I IG I You Tube

Ryan E. Hamilton - Twitter I Facebook

Dad 2.0 Summit

National At Home Dad Network

City Dads Group

Dad Bloggers on Facebook

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Want MORE??  Join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.  Raising our children while growing ourselves...

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Mar 18, 2016

I am super excited about this BONUS episode!!  I have the privilege of being in conversation with Brandie Weikle from thenewfamily.com and host of The New Family Podcast.

Part of my mission for creating this podcast is to expose listeners to parenting resources that I find inspirational and valuable, and Brandie is in total alignment with that mission.

We spend time today talking about The New Family, the 1,000 Family Project, and Brandie's experience with podcasting.

Mentioned:

The New Family Website
The 1,000 Families Project
The New Family Podcast
Positive CoParenting After Divorce Facebook Group

Mentioned New Family Podcast Episodes:

Eps 50: The Ex Next Door 
Eps 20: Seizing the Day With Your Family
Eps9: Conscious Uncoupling with Katherine Woodward Thomas
Eps 3: Parenting a Transgendered Child

Where to find Brandie and The New Family:

www.thenewfamily.com
Twitter
Facebook
Instagram

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****Limited time offer****

About MAZLO --- click here to check out the offers mentioned on the show.  If you are interested in checking out the Calm and Connected Parenting Program FOR FREE send an emaill to casey@joyfulcourage.com.  Put "Mazlo Coupon" in the subject line!!  

And don't forget to join the Joyful Courage Tribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage.

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Feb 9, 2016

Amy Lang of birdsandbeesandkids.com is back on this show and THIS time we are going next level....

We are talking about dating and middle school.

You all know that as a mother of a 13 year old, this topic is near and dear to my heart... Amy breaks it down for us, offers insights to contemplate, and may make a few of you a wee bit uncomfortable with her no-nonsense talk about what it developmentally appropriate at this age.

The result is a fun, informative and candid conversation that may take you back to your own middle school dating years.... 

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1985.....

Awkward boy, "Uh, do you want to go with me?"

Me, "Sure."

My mom, "Where are you gonna GO???"

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Bwahahahaaaa --- listen in!!

We do talk about sex, so the show may not be one you want to play over the speakers of your car or home.

Follow Amy:
Sign up for her newsletter on her website - www.birdsandbeesandkids.com
On Facebook 
On Twitter
On Instagram

Enjoy!!

 

Nov 17, 2015

This conversation landed close to my heart...  While my kids are now sleeping in their OWN beds, in their OWN rooms, ALL NIGHT LONG, that was not always the case.

And while my nighttime parenting choices weren't always the same as everyone else, they didn't follow the mainstream advice,  I did the best I could for my babies... 

The thing I really love about Alanna and her approach to supporting parents with sleep, is her willingness to meet parents where they're at.  She really believes in the idea that there is a right approach for each family, and that it is going to be related to what works in each family...

As any parent knows, there is no one size fits all here...  AND it is possible to help your child, and yourself, get better sleep.

Listen in!

 

Where to find Alanna - 

www.goodnightsleepsite.com
www.facebook.com/goodnightsleepsite
www.twitter.com/GNSleepSite
http://pinterest.com/gnsleepsite


Join the Live and Love with Joyful Courage Community here.

And don't forget to SUBSCRIBE TO THE PODCAST THROUGH ITUNES!!!  
Click here to get started.... 


Nov 3, 2015

This solo show is my own download around how resistance has been showing up in my life and what I am learning from it.  We all have those voices, right?  The one that says to us, "who cares, do what you want..." and the other that speaks from our soul and reminds us of who we really are....  Yeah, I dig into that.

I talk about my friend, Molly Knight Forde who is BRILLIANT and my guest on Episode Seven...

I mention the book, Seven Thousand Ways to Listen by Mark Nepo (its super fabulous).

It's the world according to me, and I invite you to come on in and stay awhile.  Let me know what you think, and if you are enjoying these solo rambles or not (I hope you are, because they are really fun to record).

Big huge love to you all!!

Aug 6, 2015

Such a great conversation with Marcille Smith Boyle!!  Solving problems with our kids is no joke and such an important way to teach life skills.  Marcille breaks down the task in a way that gets parents excited to practice!!  She is full of information and real life stories that I know will be inspiring and helpful to you – Enjoy!

Marcille studied the work of Ross Green –
Lost at School 
The Explosive Child

He writes and teaches about Collaborative Problem Solving (CPS) – involving kids in solving their own behavior challenges

Parents tend to think it’s our job to solve our children’s behavior challenges…  Truth is, our kids can be awesome problem solvers – yay!

The brain likes it’s own ideas best!!

David Rock – Neuro Leadership Group  

CPS has 3 main steps –

- Empathize gather info from child – from their point of view
- Define the problem
- Brainstorm solutions together with your child.

Most powerful part --- not necessarily the process, but how we shift perspective about how we look and think and feel about behavior challenges….

Recognizing that behavior is a sign of something deeper that is going on.

“Most helpful when we can focus that deeper thing, rather than just the behavior itself.”

Your child’s behavior is not the problem – What’s the problem, THE PROBLEM! (I love that)

The problem is always underneath the surface…

“Kids do well if they can.” – Ross Green

Example:

Child won’t turn in his homework.

What’s the problem?  Lacking organization skills and some auditory challenges…  The solution is brainstormed with child and addresses these problems and the homework situation shifts (solutions arehelpful)

Consequences don't necessarily teach skills…

What are the lacking skills behind the behavior?

P.E.S.O.S. (Marcille's Problem Solving Recipe)

Combines principles of Ross Green’s work, with Positive Discipline  and How to Talk so Kids will Listen and How to Listen so Kids will Talk 

Prerequisite: You and your child must be level headed - calm, in a good place emotionally

When intensity is high, communication and problem-solving skills are low…

P – Permission…  Giving yourself permission to engage and getting child’s permission

E – Empathize…  Understanding problem from child’s perspective –stay neutral and specific – “Tell me about…. (the problem)” then validate their concern

S – State your concern…  Short and sweet “My concern is…”

O – Options…  Brainstorm options for solutions that are a win/win for you both

S – Select and idea to try…  Must be realistic and mutually satisfactory

Try it out, make a date to review and see how it’s going…

 

Seeing our kids as a person who wants to do well, but have something in their way towards that success….

Watch the video below --

Click here for Marcille's handout on the steps of P.E.S.O.S.

Marcille Smith Boyle
Website - www.workingparenting.com  – blog, free gift, newsletter
Facebook – Working Parenting
Email - marcillesmithboyle@gmail.com

Jul 20, 2015

What a GIFT to have the opportunity to interview Amy Lang of Birds+Bees+Kids!  We had a great time discussing what to be talking about with our kdis when it comes to bodies and sex and staying safe...  

Nothing is off limits here - from where babies come from to blow jobs to birth control --- listen in and get informed and then TALK TO YOUR KIDS!

Like Amy says, being INFORMED is being EMPOWERED to make smart choices!

LISTEN IN NOW!!

Jun 8, 2015

Podcast with Kim Estes

 

Intro – music feedback?  Mention speakpipe

 

Kim Into with Family – two daughters, middle/high schoolers

 

Savvy Parents Safe Kids

www.savvyparentssafekids.com

 

Patty Fitzgerald - Safely Ever After

 

 

Lots of strategies…  not just “this is what you do in the moment”

 

Being home alone… 2 tips:

 

Don't open the door, acknowledge the door –

In a strong voice: “Who is it?” followed by, “I can’t help you…” and walk away.

 

Know what to do if there is a fire –

Get out of the house and use a neighbors phone to call 911

 

Practice!!

 

Talking about having an “out” for sticky situations…  Teach your kids language to use and practice the language…

 

Free range in the world is safer than free range online.

The internet is a place, not a thing….

Safety radar isn’t quite as tuned in….

 

PDF of Super 10 Rules For Safety

 

Don’t scare them, it's not helpful

“Family” safety rule

Check in – make it a family thing

Lead by example 

 

 

LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!!!  Leave a comment on iTunes! 

 

Apr 9, 2015

This was such a fun conversation with my dear friend and colleague, Julietta Skoog.  She is such a powerful model for what it looks like to parent small children with Positive Discipline - I love watching her in action!

PLUS, she has been doing Family Meetings with her girls since the youngest was in a highchair!!!

Listen in and let me know what you think!

You can find more information on Julietta at www.juliettaskoog.com

You can find more about the Family Meeting Ecourse I mention at the end of the course by clicking here.

Apr 9, 2015

This is a solo show, meaning, it's just me.  Listen in as I share what my purpose is and how I want to make a difference in YOUR world!  Get an inside look at why I am passionate about this work and what fuels me to keep sharing it with you....

Click here to find out more about coaching with me.

Click here to find out which live and online offers are coming up.

Apr 8, 2015

What a gift it was to spend time talking to Ariadne Brill of Positive Parenting Connection!  We dug into how making agreements with our kids helps them to develop a sense of trust and capability - while strengthening our relationship with them along the way.  Ariadne has some great ideas around how to bring more ease to mealtimes and shares some resources for parents for teaching and modeling self regulation.

Resources for listeners:

Check out Ariadne's book on Amazon - Twelve alternatives to time out

From Positive Parenting Connection - A post about creating a Chill-Out Corner with your child

The latest Joyful Courage post around making agreements - What was our agreement?

Find Positive Parenting Connection on Facebook,Pinterest, and Twitter

 

Apr 8, 2015

It was my great honor to spend over and hour on the phone with Andy Smithson of TRU Parenting recently.

We spent our time really digging into the way emotional triggers show up while navigating the challenges of raising kids, and Andy shared some of what he offers parents in the way of finding their calm.  Enjoy!!

"Not knowing is one of the most powerful tools and skills that we have as parents...  It keeps us curious makes us let our children guide the process..."
-  Andy Smithson

Resources mentioned during the podcast:

Childbirth: My Journey from Fear to Peace

The Quick Calm Toolkit

How to Stop Yelling in 21 Days

Get Off That Train!

 

TRU Calm: Parent Relaxation and Self-Renewal Series


* Be sure to listen at the end of the podcast for a special discount offer from Andy to be used towards this product!

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